XXIX Summer Olympics
Once every four years, the world comes together to honor the sports of summer, and most of us say, "They took My Name Is Earl off for this?" But that's only when stuff like synchronized swimming is on. For the Summer Olympics opening ceremonies, airing Friday, Aug. 8, on NBC, we can't get enough. Who doesn't love seeing what the Canadians will be wearing this year or whether the Chinese will re-enact Tiananmen Square set to the music of David Bowie's China Girl? Regardless, dust off the big-screen TV and call the neighbors 'cause we got a hankerin' for some opening ceremonies -- Beijing style.
Setting the scene:
First and foremost you need Olympic rings over the front door. We suggest buying Hula-Hoops and mounting accordingly. Then you'll need an Olympic torch that will be lit once all of the guests arrive. Inside, have a sign denoting "Olympic Village Beijing" and hang a wet Speedo over one corner. Add various sports equipment such as archery bull's-eyes, basketball backboards, boxing gloves, baseball gloves and bats, soccer balls, kayaks and tennis rackets -- basically, turn your house into a Dick's Sporting Goods. Give guests small American flags to wave when the U.S. athletes find themselves on the world stage during the parade of nations. (Hint: U comes late in the Chinese alphabet, so sit tight.) In addition, you need to China-fy your place -- lamps, screens, fans, umbrellas. In the interest of sportsmanship, everyone gets a gold medal just for showing up.
Attire:
Guests need to choose one of the following: athlete, judge, referee or spectator and dress accordingly. We've noticed the folks who shoot the starting gun at track and field events tend to be the best dressed.
On the menu:
Um, Chinese? Send everyone menus from your favorite Chinese restaurant and ask them for their order. Have it delivered midparty.
On the hi-fi:
Hero (an official song of the Beijing Olympics) by Chris Yu, Summon the Heroes by John Williams, Chase the Clouds Away by Chuck Mangione.
The showstopper:
When you think of the Summer Olympics, you think of Carl Lewis, the American track star. Or Mark Spitz -- think how fast that guy would have been without that mustache. Actually, you probably think of Bruce Jenner. All these guys are available to speak at your party. Actually they might be busy this week, but there are plenty to choose from at TSE Sports & Entertainment.
The summer olympics in Beijing are going to be phenomenal