'The 34th Annual People's Choice Awards'
Do you ever feel as if your voice isn't heard? That no matter what you do, your existence is meaningless? Oh no, dear friends, you -- nay, we -- we are the people. And for the 34th year in a row, our voices will be heard -- saying things like "Knocked Up was our favorite movie comedy of the year!" So get the bean dip, call the neighbors, and let's find out exactly what we the people said about last year as we party around The 34th Annual People's Choice Awards Tuesday, Jan. 8, on CBS. Just as a heads-up, we voted for Tom Selleck as favorite male TV star again.
Setting the scene:
The theme, people, is people. And, we guess, awards. So why not go to a homeless shelter and invite a few of the residents who might already think they're somebody famous. If you're afraid of having those people in your house, ask guests to come dressed as a character from a nominated television show or movie. Invitations should include printouts of the nominee list (available at the PCA Web site) with instructions for everyone to make their choices and bring them to the party. Whoever chooses the most winners gets a prize -- perhaps a DVD of the nominated Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End.
Attire:
Everyone should come dressed as someone in the favorite leading man category -- Jamie Foxx, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson or Joaquin Phoenix. (Did they have movies out last year? And what happened to Selleck?)
On the menu:
Taste has never been a real strong point of these awards. Serve Halle Berries, Reese's (Witherspoon) Peanut Butter Cups, doughnuts in honor of The Simpsons Movie, bacon for Wild Hogs or something French in honor of Ratatouille.
On the hi-fi:
Work out a mixed selection of nominated artists: Beyonce, Rihanna, Kanye West, Timbaland with Justin Timberlake and Nelly Furtado, Genesis, the Police, Fergie, Maroon 5, Gwen Stefani, Rascal Flatts, John Mayer, and Tim McGraw with Faith Hill, just to name a few.
The showstopper:
Sure, having all these swell people watching the show in your living room is great, but we think you're meant for more. If fact, there's a chance you're exactly what Hollywood is looking for. So visit Seatfiller and find your calling! When a star gets up to accept an award -- or go to the loo -- you put your keister in his or her seat so it looks as if the place is full when the TV cameras scan the crowd. Just think, you might keep Angelina Jolie's seat warm.
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