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Ghosts are people, too. And so it really irks us when they are shamelessly exploited for the American public's entertainment. Actually, that's not true: We don't believe in ghosts. We do, however, believe in shows shot with night-vision cameras and a sense for the dramatic. That's why we love Ghost Hunters Academy airing Wednesdays on Syfy. It's as if they've combined the original Ghost Hunters with Road Rules. So if you thought your GPA was scary, wait until you see us party to Ghost Hunters Academy!
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The fact that we can't find our car in a parking lot has no bearing on how much we love The Amazing Race, airing Sundays on CBS. Even so, there is something awesome - nay, amazing - about watching teams want to strangle each other while sitting in the back seat of a Russian taxi while searching for a building full of ballerinas after an all-night flight. So if you love watching other people travel to exciting locations around the globe from the comfort of your couch, call your friends; we're throwing The Amazing Race party!
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If you've ever awoken to find you've been impregnated by a much younger man, you can surely empathize with Billie of Accidentally on Purpose, airing Mondays on CBS. If you've never awoken to that, perhaps you can at least sympathize. Then again, you, like us, might just find it funny. No, not in that "I was a Duggar for Halloween!" sort of way, but rather in that "Hey, Jenna Elfman must have studied under Strasberg because she actually looks pregnant" sort of way. So if you find May-December pregnancy as humorous as we do, call your friends and neighbors; we're throwing an Accidentally on Purpose party!
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It's funny how the farther we get from traditions, the more we seem to appreciate and cling to them. And if you are as hooked on Modern Family, airing Wednesdays on ABC, as we are, you'll see just how funny real life is in the 21st century. It really makes you appreciate the interracial gay couple with the Asian baby who have Photoshopped their pictures onto a Norman Rockwell Saturday Evening Post cover. So if you and your life partner are thinking about adopting a foreign child, or your grandpa just married a college cheerleader, invite them over to the house; we're throwing a Modern Family party!
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Life is too short to let those doughnuts you had for breakfast control your life. And if you watch DietTribe Fridays on Lifetime, you'll realize that if you let doughnuts control you, your life might be shorter than you hoped. Luckily, DietTribe is a wonderfully supportive environment of compassion, tough love and encouragement that makes all of us believe we can take back our lives from the mindless, nonstop eating that has become so commonplace in modern-day America. And even if we think we can't, super hunk and trainer Jessie Pavelka will flex his sculpted biceps, casting a spell that is strangely satisfying even to the heterosexuals among us. So call your friends and neighbors; we're throwing a DietTribe party!
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A girl doesn't start out thinking that one
day she'll be a cougar - a single woman in her 40s who prowls the club scene
hoping to sink her teeth into younger men - but it happens. And if we can
suspend disbelief for just 30 minutes and watch Cougar Town Wednesdays on
ABC, we might buy that Courteney Cox is one. Sure, that's a stretch, but it is
an all-too-real situation for some women and an all-too-lucky break for young
men everywhere. So grab the concealer and a heaping helping of Wonderbra; we're
throwing a Cougar Town party!
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For those of us on the seven-year plan for
our associate's degree, there is a certain something that makes us not want to
turn off Community, the new comedy airing Thursdays on NBC. And while that
"something" could be that it is remarkably funny or well written, the honest
truth is that it's more fun than studying for our third try at Latin 101.
(Seriously, tempus fugit, professor!) And any time you can get Chevy Chase and
Joel McHale to take Spanish from a guy named Senor Chang, you'll get an A for
effort. Trust us, the prerequisite for a good time is inviting your friends and
neighbors to our Community party!
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For too many years we've been restrained by
the notion that models are empty-headed mannequins capable of little more than
walking in straight lines and lounging on motor yachts in the Mediterranean.
But thanks to Models of the Runway, airing Thursdays on Lifetime, we can add
talking and eye rolling to the mix! The behind-the-scenes look at the other
people with something to prove on Project Runway has given us a reason to stay
up Thursday nights and left us wondering if we should pluck our eyebrows with
more regularity. So if you like getting dressed up and told you look gorgeous,
call your friends; we're throwing a Models of the Runway party!
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Since football season is right around the corner, we're taking advantage of the preseason coverage to get our game-day party faces on for when the real thing hits. And nothing beats the preseason Sunday Night Football matchup between the Chicago Bears and the Denver Broncos Aug. 30 on NBC. So if you're psyched that football season is right around the corner and you love tailgating with your friends, get your cleats out of the attic and fire up the grill -- we're throwing a preseason pigskin party!
All we ever knew about Egypt we learned
from Steve Martin's King Tut bit. So when Egyptologist Kara Cooney started the
six-part series Out of Egypt, premiering Monday, Aug. 24, on Discovery
Channel, we were fascinated by her lack of dance skills and general disinterest
that he was "born in Arizona" or "got a condo made of stone-a." Still there are
a lot of other fascinating facts Cooney serves up in an attempt to demystify
and "desensationalize" the legends of ancient Egypt. (Yep, every party needs a
pooper.) So call your friends; we're heading Out of Egypt.
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