Happy 33rd birthday to Usher

Happy Birthday, Usher Raymond. Thanks to you, people no longer associated the word "usher" with a menial theater job, but rather a sexy, soulful, fleet-footed R&B superstar.

Usher Terry Raymond IV (there were three others?!) turned 33 on Friday (Oct. 14). Usher's career accomplishments are diverse. Since bursting onto the scene with "U Remind Me," Usher has gone on to sell tens of millions of albums and was named the Billboard Hot 100 artist of the 2000s decade. Usher also starred in the horror movie classic (?) "The Faculty." Romantically, Usher had a two year relationship with TLC member Rozonda "Chilli" Thomas; this, of course, proved once and for all that Usher was not a scrub, since no member of TLC would ever be involved with a scrub. 

But perhaps Usher's most notable achievement, for better or worse, is bringing the world Justin Bieber. Alas, some things can never be undone. So Happy Birthday, Usher Raymond. Many happy returns. As a present, we have resealed Justin Bieber and regifted him back to you. Take the hint.