Courtney Stodden and Doug Hutchison: What's the long con here?

In a new interview with newlyweds Doug Hutchison and Courtney Stodden, Hutchison tells E! his one regret is that he also wasn't a virgin with they wed. Stodden offers to let the reporter pull her hair to prove that it's real and the couple talk about the oodles of shared interest they have, like old "I Love Lucy" and "Honeymooners" episodes.

Here's the thing: we know what we're supposed to be creeped out about a 51-year-old marrying a 16-year-old. And we are. But not necessarily for the right reasons.

On the surface we should be up-in-arms because he's a pervert and she's somewhere between child and adulthood. But have you looked at her? It's hard to work up a believable level of "She's only 16! She's a baby!" outrage about a gal who looks like they skipped right over playing with Barbies to turning herself into one.

Which right there sounds uncomfortably to our own ears like we're blaming the victim ("If you dress like that what did you think would happen?"). But it's not just the clothes and frosted lipgloss. It's the constant dazed expression, hooded eyes, head-bobbing, hair-flicking, lip-pursing, tongue-flicking, chest-thrusting, hip-jutting, body-rubbing. That's not normal behavior for anyone, no matter the age.

Stodden also says she's always "based" herself around older men because boys her own age make her "feel like a babysitting them without the income coming in, so it's kind of a rip-off." She also jokes about "tricking" Hutchison into initially thinking she was not a teenager via the provocative photos and videos on her personal website.

This in turns makes us look at Hutchison and go, "You're so being played." We're not sure what the con is here, but we get the feeling that there definitely has to be one. She can't just be in it for the free cooking and cleaning that Hutchison does. You know, except for that one time when she put on a bikini and a pair of Daisy Dukes and washed the floor.

Also, what's with the prop dog?