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RSS'Desperate Housewives': Underneath the mask
"Desperate Housewives" is gearing up for next week's big finale, so tonight featured far more setup than payoff. Luckily, it also featured a number of amusing one-liners. And a number of valuable lessons about the dangers of plastic surgery, robbing yourself, overspending, and having a private conversation while an evil mastermind is listening in on the phone. I hope you all were taking notes!
Susan and Jackson take Dave on a rollercoaster ride of emotion. They're getting married! Jackson totally knows Dave was backstage at the club that night! But he's an illegal immigrant and easily taken care of! While I'm sorry Jackson got deported, I have no faith that Katherine really planned to follow through on that alimony "Mike" promised after she and Mike got married, so...this is definitely for the best as far as Susan is concerned. You know, aside from Dave still being on the loose and targeting her son. And aside from her ex-husband still being on track to marry her friend.
Bree, in the meantime, is seriously Up to No Good. She must reeeeeally want to keep her money, because trashing her own house must be the worst kind of torture for Bree (though hilarious to watch). At first, when Orson got all sentimental and sweet on her, I thought he knew what Bree was up to and it was calculated to make her have second thoughts. But his surprise and disappointment at finding the storage unit with all the "stolen" loot seemed genuine. I'm also going to point out that if it's a mask that's easily re-ordered and paid for, than it probably wasn't worth "stealing" in the first place. And can we take a second to talk Bree and Karl? Because they're totally going to hook up, right? (And yeah, EW.)
Oh, Gaby. Gaby, Gaby, Gaby. I mean, okay, her friend's tragic tale from Tiffany flatware to soup kitchen meals was a bit more nuanced than I thought, but still. Someone needs to sit our friend down and make her watch the MC Hammer episode of "Behind the Music," because it shouldn't be news to Gaby that money is a finite resource. Luckily, I guess, it doesn't sounds like both kids are college material. ("Bobblehead"? Mean, but it totally cracked me up.)
Tom's midlife crisis is, at this point, grounds for divorce solely based on annoyingness. I mean, his family was bordering on financial collapse just a few episodes ago, and he's considering plastic surgery as a way of youthening his way back into the workforce? Maybe you should just spend five minutes on the internet, buddy - it's not like Twitter is a state secret. The plastic surgery victim Lynette introduces Tom to will probably feature in my nightmares tonight - he looked like the love child of Joan Rivers and an alien. Terrifying.
Favorite quotes:
- Tom to his college friend, guessing how he looks so young: "Diet? Exercise? Eating a bowl of stem cells every morning?"
- After Susan threatens to call off the fake marriage. Jackson: "They'll send me back!" Susan: "It's Canada, not Iran!"
- As they enter their ransacked house. Bree: "Orson, we've been robbed!" Orson: "It wasn't me. I swear."
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this was a pretty funny episode. Thing is... it was not supposed to be funny, it was supposed to build suspense to the finale next week.
And what job does Jackson have that he so doesn't want to leave, isn't he a painter? Do houses need not to be painted in Canada? I'm wondering is this some alternate universe where Canada is some horrible place
tonight was a pretty average episode. I felt a little sad for orson and I still do. Susan was not as desperate acting as I thought and I am happy that Jackson is out of the picture for now. Gabby's daughters are not 2 and 4 years old, try 8 and 6. tom is an idiot. Katherine is the new most Desperate Housewife on the show. I wonder if any one is going to die in next weeks episode, I am so ready for this mystery to be over with.
Favorite scene: none in particular but I did like the scene with Gabby calling her daughter a bobble head (hilarious)
Second Favorite Scene: I also liked when Lynnette was shocked that Tom and his friend at the party were in college at the same time. His friend did look great for his mid 40's.
i really enjoyed this episode... it was desperate housewives at its best... one liners aplenty, solid stories, and great setups for the finale.... i was happy, happier than ive been for most of this season
Cannot wait for the finale...Marc Cherry brings all of the surprises in the finale!!! I read some spoilers and if they are true then here's a giant helping of OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Team Katherine!!!!!!!!!!!!
Can Katherine please leave? And Bree, you were one of my favorites, what have they done to you?
One episode before the finale and its another snoozer.
Oh yeh, Katherine can log right into Mike's email account. yup..sure
Susan is so dumb that she would expect alimony to continue after remarrying and not having it put into a binding contract.
Do Katherine, Mike, Susan, Bree EVER work?
Gee..let's see Susan will get married next week, Jackson gets killed by Dave and she will be left with no alimony and will have to give up her $50k SUV. suspenseful!!
and who can call and get someone picked up that fast. He was from Canada!
Yeah, what a dull show this has become. Watching the Lynette and Tom scenes is equivalent to seeing ice melt.
Bree's storyline is not believable. Katherine needs to go as she adds little to this show, and does anyone even care what Dave does at this point? Pretty bad since that was the main storyline for the season.
It's as if no one knew what to do after the Edie character left.
No wonder the show has been falling out of the Top Ten in ratings. Stale writing.
Nicolette was lucky to get off this ship before it totally sank.
Whatever, Nicolette, needs to go to acting cl*** and do something about her tore up face adn body... She just isnt a good actress, so between Dana and her, ofcourse they will pick emmy winner Dana Delany.
I just hate it when TV characters act so darn stupid!
Tom: I understand his frustration, but plastic surgury?
Bree: Straightening up the mantle? She is O/C, but not an idiot!
Susan: One word - alimony.
Gaby: She'll feel humble and grateful - for about 30 seconds, as usual.
Mike: Decides to propose, after looking at Susan and Jackson wistfully. Right!
Storage locker company person: Would NEVER speak of a rental with anybody other than the contract signer. Absolutely forbidden. "Oh, by the way, that Swiss bank account that person you said was your wife just opened? The $10 million was deposited just like she asked."
Once you ***ume that Dave is a raging criminal, he acts the most rational of anybody! Pretty ridiculous.