'America's Next Top Model': Carmen Miranda propaganda

This week, "America's Next Top Model" is whisked away to Brazil, home of capoeira, Carmen Miranda and -- fittingly enough -- "Brazil's Next Top Model" (Tyra informs us "America's Next Top Model" is in many countries around the world, and you just have to believe her, because she's Tyra.)   

Although most of these girls probably couldn't prep for an international flight on their own, it's fun to watch them in Amazing Race mode. Fo and Natalie win $500 flip flops -- yes, that's correct -- and when The Girl (that would be Helo Pinheiro) arrives she teaches all the young whippersnappers a thing or two about how to move Brazilian-style. 

This will help them in the future, hint hint, but first the girls have to check out their new digs and Natalie has to whine and complain about what a drag it is: no pool, no ocean, she hasn't "seen anything special yet." Oh, shut it, Natalie. 

The models' next challenge is capoeira, an Afro-Brazilian art that's half-fight, half-dance. With an instructor's help the girls give it a shot: Natalie sort of slouches through it, while Celia is so into it she totally roundhouses Aminat in the face (come on, admit it: you laughed too). Hopefully it didn't surprise any of the girls when the Two Jays sauntered up with a "twist" -- their capoeira session is going to be a photo shoot, too. Fo, again, wins. With victory come the spoils: she can steal 50% of another girl's photo shoot for herself.  Big shocker, she chooses Teyona. 

At panel, the usual judges are joined by Fernanda Motta, host of "Brazil's Next Top Model," and Tyra's massive new weave. Accordingly to Paulina, Aminat is boring ... and she says it to her face, just like that: "You're boring, Aminat." Ha! Allison -- who is picked first -- is praised for showing some emotion, some pazaaz, while Fo is chastised for showing too much pizzazz. Celia looks pretty good but according to Tyra, homegirl looks old. 

Aminat and Natalie are called last. Natalie does something I have been wishing someone would do for forever: she points out the discrepancy between what Mr. Jay told her on set ("Gorgeous!") and what the judges were telling her at present ("One-note, boring"). However truthy that was, throwing Jay under the bus doesn't fly and she's back on her way to being Palos Verde's Next Top Model.    

Who doesn't love the overseas trip near the end of the season? This is no exception. Sao Paolo is pretty and exotic, an excellent choice.

The Ugly

With the possible exceptions of Allison and Celia -- and only her because it's been a while since that judges panel stunt of hers and my memory is not what it used to be -- these girls have been a petty, snotty lot. Theres a lot of talk about the competition, and very little about good sportsmanship. 

Natalie: while occasionally funny, you were certainly the snottiest. I shall not weep for thee. 

The Poll

Fo was your fave in last week's photo shoot by a whopping 36%. Let's take a gander into the future and put our money where our mouths are: who do you think will win next week's "go-see" challenge?