'NCIS': What Would Tyler Durden Do?

On a long enough time line, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero. It's the job of NCIS to figure out why some of those people die unnaturally. Of course, I think Gibbs and the gang would find it more helpful if those involved would break the first two rules.

The Spoilers are now a part of Project Mayhem, having been moved out of the basement.

Camping is fun, except when someone not invited is lurking in the bushes. It's only two kids not invited to a party, although the guy tries to invite himself anyway with a bottle of Jägermeister as a peace offering. Before the offer can be accepted, yet another guy stumbles from the woods, only he falls dead.

DiNozzo is taking pictures of his best "deep in thought" face with his webcam. Seems a new website designed to help you one-up the world has been created, and the competitive side of DiNozzo has taken over. Ibeatyou.com... yes, it's for real. Of course, Ziva doesn't really see the point of the website. DiNozzo says it's for fun. Ziva tries to rally McGee on her side, but he's already challenging for the best psycho face. Gibbs rounds up the gang. Over the river and through the woods, they find Petty Officer Greg Collins looking beat the hell up. Ducky notices blunt force trauma, but also notices that the officer's minor injuries were tended to but the major ones were ignored. Once they find the car with bullet holes, DiNozzo notes someone else was directly involved.

During the autopsy, Ducky confirms Collins suffered injuries in both the crash and in the time before. He shows Gibbs proof the killer also helped to wrap the wounds.

Ziva is looking through crime scene photos when Gibbs wants them displayed on the big screen. Of course, one of the candid air guitar photos shows up during the process. McGee catches Greg's phone in use, so the gang zips over to his house. Once there, McGee finds a wad of cash in a laundry basket, Ziva finds a bloody towel while DiNozzo finds teeth. The friendly neighborhood watch saunter over to offer all the information they can. Ever since Greg moved in, the quiet street isn't so quiet anymore. With his finger on the pulse of late 90s pop culture, DiNozzo figures out the suburbs has a new fight club franchise.

Running the prints, Abby finds no fingerprint matches, but is reinvigorated once McGee switches in a new Big Gulp for her. From the DNA search reveals the profile of one Sam Bennett, a regular wayward loser, currently part of a salvage crew on the USS Rubicon. Once on the ship, the foreman tells DiNozzo and McGee that Sam is on the run. With jobs like that, the crews are normally less than reputable.

Back at NCIS, DiNozzo can't get a man on the other side of a phone conversation to cooperate, but lucky for him, Sam is carted into NCIS anyway. In the interrogation room, Gibbs learns that Greg was a real pal to Sam, even going as far as securing the welding job for him. When Gibbs presses for information on the fighting, Sam upholds the code he swore to. After quite the back-and-forth, Sam confesses to killing Greg, but the gang quickly figure out he's taking credit for something he didn't do. Gibbs wants names of the fighters, but all Sam gives is nicknames.

McGee and Abby study Greg's car. Abby would pay to see Gibbs versus the Terminator while McGee wants to lay money on a Gibbs/Godzilla smack down. Once the fun is over, the lab rat shows our fearless leader a computer simulation of the car being accosted by another car. Of course, McGee traces part of the paint to a brand new 2009 Maserati Quattroporte, linking the specific car to one Tabitha Summers. She arrives at NCIS with Dale, her attorney/fourth husband in tow. She doesn't recognize Greg from a photo, but knows her car when she sees it. Gibbs focuses on gathering names while Ziva wants information on the car. They're being not quite as cooperative as NCIS would like.

Running new prints, Abby gets a partial from Dale, but when the gang tries to corner the guy, Tabitha reenters the building saying he has driven off in the car. McGee runs the plates proving in the process his alibi is less than stellar. Abby locates encrypted files on his laptop. Once unlocked, they find it's nothing but naughty instant message chat files. From the chat logs, they get an address.

At the apartment, Gibbs and DiNozzo are invited in by quite the sexy voice. The two find hidden cameras and a dummy in the shower which takes their picture. Gibbs picks the lock on the equipment, revealing multiple monitors recording their every move. McGee determines the apartment is nothing more than a blackmailing operation targeting rich men finding it difficult keeping it in their pants. The big reveal is that the whole enterprise is registered to the dead petty officer.

The gang finds the ritzy car in question at Greg's house. They surround the house and prepare to move in, only to find Dale dead in the backyard. Blunt force trauma is once again the name of the game. The neighborhood watch reappears again, telling Gibbs they saw Sam earlier that day. Later, they determine Sam lured Dale to the house, calling from the shipyard.

Back at the USS Rubicon, no one is to be found. They split up and search the ship when the lights go out. DiNozzo finds where Sam's been sleeping. McGee runs into Sam, who makes a run for it. After some tense moments waiting for McGee to respond to frequent hails, Gibbs finally finds him placing the cuffs on the wayward loser. At NCIS, Sam says it wasn't him. Simultaneously, Abby checks out discrepancies in the emails Dale received. Meanwhile, the now vindicated Sam is offered a lineup by Gibbs to point out the real killer. Adam Parker, the head of the neighborhood watch, arrives at NCIS with the same deal. Parker peers into the interrogation room and immediately identifies Sam as the killer, but when the roles are reversed, Sam singles out Parker without hesitation.

In the end, DiNozzo heads off to a midnight screening of Goodfellas and invites Ziva, but she declines, only to stay behind and practice her air guitar.

The next all-new NCIS is in two weeks, so until then, have fun!

Now that you get a small break from the action, what do you think of the season so far? What are your expectations going into the second half of the season?

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