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RSS'CSI': Melinda Clarke Returns
At last, our long national nightmare is over. The people (mostly me) have spoken, and the decision met with a cheer from millions of supporters: Lady Heather returns to CSI.
[Don't make me beat you over the head with these spoilers.]
Did you think I meant something else? I've made no secret of my love for Melinda Clarke's character. And by love, I mean I always thought Lady Heather and Gil Grissom had a more interesting relationship then the predictable office romance between Grissom and Sara Sidle. Tonight's episode reinforced that for me. But first...
We open on Gil en route to a crime scene where Catherine is trying to preserve a tire track from a driving rainstorm. Nearby? The body of a man dragged under a car, whose fingertips and toes are missing. Good Lord, ouch. The theory is that the vic was tied to the undercarriage of an SUV, lost his appendages when they touched the asphalt at speed, and then came loose and fell.
As if that weren't enough, Doc Robbins uncovers a slew of mysterious injuries: puncture wounds around his nipples, electrical burns on his tongue and nine post-mortem stab wounds. His true cause of death? Strangulation.
Did I mention Gil's distracted throughout all of this by blipverts of Sara saying vaguely breakup-ish things?
The injuries seem to indicate more than casual S&M play, so Gil consults his favorite madam-slash-dominatrix, Lady Heather. Only she's just Heather (to him; she's Lady Heather in my submissive heart) now that she has a master's degree in psychology and is a licensed therapist. "Let me guess," Gil snarks, "sex therapy?" We never find out.
Lady Heather confirms we're looking at a victim well into S&M and suggests the CSIs check for paraphernalia around his house. Nick, Riley and Greg learn our victim, one Ian Wallace, has a cute girlfriend named Justine Stefani. He also has blood spatter in his living room and hall, bloodstains on a shirt in the closet and a box of sex toys so big he could open a Batteries Not Included franchise. He also has a brochure for Lower Linx, which Lady Heather rats out as a secret S&M club.
Sure enough, Brass and Nick find the sort of equipment at Lower Linx that could have caused the more voluntary among Ian's injuries. The club's owner, Michelle Tornay, is more than a little evasive.
One suspect is eliminated when our CSIs process a burned-out SUV and find inside a charred corpse with breast implants (silicon is highly heat-resistant, Cath informs us) that match Ian's girlfriend Justine. A set of footprints lead to tire tracks. Did the killer have help?
Maybe, because now we get a More You Know moment: A dom will have several slaves into the same activities, which means our investigators need to find someone with similar marks as Ian. Thank God for cellphone technology, which shows Justine's last call as coming from insurance salesman Martin Devlin. Wanna bet whose blood is on Ian's shirt? Martin's. And hey, Martin sent a photo to a wrong number (but intended for Justine) of Ian getting down and dirty with... Martin's lawyer. Whuh?
The lawyer admits to being the dom for Ian and Martin. She fell for Ian, which made Martin jealous. Martin caught them in the act, snapped the photo, sent it to the wrong number, and punched Ian, leaving blood in the hall. And yet nobody involved has feet that peg them as the person who torched Justine and her SUV. Is there a last-minute revelation? There is not. The CSIs determine to look for more evidence. Nice! I like multi-episode storylines.
As for Gil, we see during an impromptu session with Lady Heather that Sara has been speaking to us all episode via video file from some sort of ship that needs scientists and activists. Sara was burnt out by the work, and was hurt by Gil's comment that relationships can wither, and says they're over and that she's not too broken up about that. Whoa, another surprise. But don't stop reading just yet. Lady Heather deduces Gil wants to be someplace other than work or home, which both remind him of Sara, and offers up her guest bedroom. Our last scene shows him fully clothed on the bed, with Heather looking on concernedly. She turns to leave and...
"Heather," Gil says, "would you stay?"
With that, she steps in and closes the door on us.
Such a great episode. But where's it headed? Who do you think killed Ian and Justine? And how does Gil's dalliance with Lady Heather work into William Petersen leaving the show?
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Zap2it Twitter Talk 
I'd like to think that Grissom will wise up and get with Heather, but I'm not that optimistic. Unfortunately, the Casablanca lover in me sees Grissom staying behind only for a little while before going off in search of his (ick) beloved Sara. He's a CSI, for cripes sake...he could probably find the fifth rat from the left in the hold of the ship Sara's currently bunking on, all without leaving Las Vegas. *sigh* Staying with Heather would be the best end for Grissom, in my never-humble opinion, but I think he's a bit of a dominator-type himself, and I don't think he'll let Sara just leave. He and Heather are more alike than I think either of them want to admit.
I love that Nick is starting to channel Willows, in that he was being almost a Papa Bear while checking the house for clues with the other two lab rats. I'm surprised he didn't make them stand in corners in the kitchen.
So, we're down to only a half-dozen or so episodes left with Grissom. Part of me will be seriously depressed when he leaves (as much as I get over fictional characters that don't exist, that is), but another part is ready for somebody new to come in and take over. As long as CSI doesn't slide into suck, I'll still be watching.
It wasn't the greatest of episodes, but it was still solid. I liked how the murder case wasn't solved. Why didn't they promote Liz V***ey(I can't think of her character name right now)to be the new field CSI. Riley sucks.
MOST OF AMERICA IS INTO S&M...THEY ELECTED OBAMA DIDN'T THEY
^^^^Mmkay, trigger.
wholetruthy, haven't you eaten a gun yet? If not, do the world a favor and do so. And turn off that goddamned caps lock, you pathetic, worthless waste of human flesh. The internet has been around long enough for somebody even as stupid as you to figure out that typing in all caps is ****ing rude. Figure it out, moron, and then go back under your rock and stay there.
EVen though Grissom claims it is not therapy, it seems it IS, just in an unofficial sense. I suspect that all of the Heather/Grissom relationship will end up being therapy and convinces Grissom to leave to go south of the equator to join back with Sarah. Which, for me, would be a very flimsy excuse to leave the job Grissom clearly loves more than the people around him. I honestly thought the Lady Heather thing with Grissom SHOULD have gone further and I have always wondered why the writers never pursued that as a storyline for Grissom. I have ALWAYS looked at Melinda Clark's character as "Lady Heather" not simply as "heather". She will always be Lady Heather to me! Hey, but what do I know? I'm not a screenwriter... I dislike multi-episode cases. If that is what this IS, instead of simply an unsolved case, then I would have at least thought they would have had the courtesy to put up a "To Be Continued" notice at the end. WHY is it that all of the idiots out there always use ALL CAPS to make an irrelevant comment??? Pardon my French mister all caps, but "Mangez la merde et mourir!"
That's "Eat **** and die," for all of those non-Gallic types out there. :P
I totally agree with you ANDY! Lady Heather is all kinds of AWESOME! I've alwways thought Gil & Heather had waaaay more chemistry than his predictable, boring, and poorly-matched pairing with Sara. If this story arc goes on to have Gil & Lady Heather exploring a relationship now that dullsville-Sara is adios, I say, bring it on! This was a great episode btw. Very interesting, as is all of Lady Heather's episodes...and no, I'm not being biased, they really are all well-written ep.s when Melissa George guests.
Damn, I meant Melinda Clarke...had a brain freeze after reading Grey's update.
And there I was expecting closure with Heather. I'm so happy! They're so right for one another! And Sara's either a)happy or b) emotionally blackmailing Grissom, both 'ship enders. That ship needs to have sailed! I also loved the balance at the end: neither the case nor the G/H story concluded. More Heather, please, PLEASE, TPTB!!!