Premierewatch: 'Brothers & Sisters' and the Walkers' wild weekend

Welcome back to Brothers & Sisters, where the family drama is plentiful, the mistakes are manifold, and nobody knows how to keep their mouths shut. Ah, Walkers -- I've missed you! You make my family seem absolutely perfect!

This spoiler has a hard time thinking of Assistant Director Skinner as the head of a law firm.

Mo' Walkers, mo' problems. Let's see what our favorite drunken-lush WASP family has been up to since we last saw them, shall we?

Kitty and Robert are trying to adopt a kid, so they've asked for a recommendation letter from Sarah. What they get is six pages of overwhelming cheese that would give any expectant mother gestational diabetes. that hardly seems like Sarah's style... and it isn't. Sarah never quite got around to it (because seriously, Sarah has plenty of more important things to do than help Kitty adopt a child), so she pawned it off on Nora.

Actually Sarah has been busy resenting Holly, sniping at Tommy, and beating up her malfunctioning air conditioner. She also obsessing about Ryan, the mysterious add-a-Walker whose existence was revealed last season so Justin and Rebecca could get together without everyone crying incest. She saves enough energy to be righteously indignant towards...

Tommy who, along with Holly has decided they need to cut costs at Ojai. One of the costs to cut? The law firm they employ. Unfortunately, that means firing ...

Kevin who is actually feeling great because his boss (Skinner!) told him he's the number-one associate this month. That's largely because of Ojai. Skinner hands over the keys to his seriously posh beach house, which tends to be a prelude to partnership. He invites Scotty for a quiet weekend, but that does awry when he and Sarah tell...

Nora about the Add-A-Walker. Nora doesn't want the rest of the family to know, because even SHE thinks this plot development is over the top. Unfortunately, Kitty walks in and Kevin has to vamp, so he ends up accidentally inviting the whole family to the house. That includes

Justin and Rebecca who are indeed dating, but who haven't told the family yet because it would make things weird. Good plan -- except Paige and Cooper, Sarah's hellspawn children, catch them making out. Paige is old enough to understand blackmail.

Everyone descends on the beach house, where we are introduced to a moderately hideous crystal whale, which, Scotty tells us, is worth more than our cars. And, since you can't introduce a moderately hideous crystal whale in the first act without it going off in the third, Paige and Cooper pull down the shelving unit it and other ridiculously expensive tchotchkes are on, which they blame on Justin.

This leads to the Ceremonial Walker Family Unveiling of the Secrets, and everything is spilled to everyone. Then comes the Traditional Walker Pout-Fest, and a bit of the Time-Honored Walker Family Festival of Recrimination. Good times!

Justin and Rebecca make up, of course, but they're the only ones who have it so easy. Kevin has to tell Skinner about the breakage and the loss of the account. Kitty is rightfully pissed at Sarah, who expects everyone to forgive her because... well, I'm not sure why she expects this. I'd have drop-kicked her to Guam by now. Kevin isn't taking Tommy's phone calls, and Kitty isn't speaking to Sarah. The one nice bit -- Nora has the satisfaction of marching into Holly's office and telling her she wasn't the only Dirty Mistress William had on the side. Holly claims she doesn't believe it but Nora and the rest of us) can tell that she scored a direct hit. Point for Nora.

In the end, Sarah tries to drop off a heartfelt, non-schmaltzy letter for Kitty to use in her adoption petition, which she thinks will make things ok. The frustrating part? It probably will. Oh, well, At least Kitty told her that they have a problem with trust. Maybe that will make various Walkers think twice before.... You know what? Never mind. This family doesn't work that way. 

Highlights, thoughts and odds and ends

• The opening segment, with Nora's pastel-tinted version of the family played out over Hallmark-level music and Sarah's heartfelt voiceover, was hysterical. It was interrupted by Kitty's reaction: Kitty: "Some poor woman could spend her entire last trimester slogging through this thing. I don't think she wrote it. I think she got it off the internet -- at schmaltzfest.com." Robert: "More likely she just sat down one night, cracked open a bottle of merlot and kept writing until she lost consciousness." Hee!
• Justin and Rebecca do a seriously lousy job of lying about their relationship. Justin, I hope you don't play poker, because you'd lose a LOT of money.
• Kevin discovers that Ryan is likely to be in Bakersfield. Why do they never move out of state?
• Kitty tricks Sarah into revealing she didn't write the letter by making up a story that was supposedly in the latter about Kitty giving her cookies to a friend in third grade. It wasn't in the letter, and it never happened. Sarah: "I should have known, you would never give your cookies away to anyone."
• Sarah does seem to idealize Kitty's life -- actually she seems to think everyone has it easier than her. I'm getting seriously sick of Sarah.
• Scotty tells Kevin that the crystal whale: "cost more than your car." "Really?" Kevin says. "Now I hate my car."
• Rebecca gets a little freaked out about the news about Ryan. "They're completely wrapped up with how to deal with my replacement." Plus, if Rebecca and Justin break up, she's afraid she'll be written out of the Walker family again Rebecca -- flee now. It's healthier.
• I love that Robert didn't make it easy on Sarah. "Nobody can slide the knife between the ribs quite like the people who love us," he says. "You're not going to let me off the hook here, are you?" Sarah asks. Nope. Nor should he.
• Still Robert tells Kitty that Sarah did feel bad the next day, and tells her that she's got to communicate if she wants to get along with Sarah.
• Nora confronting Holly with the news that he was bonking other other women was a sight to behold. Go, Nora!
• "Everybody Hurts," like the Jeff Buckley/Leonard Cohen "Hallelujah," need to be banned from soundtrack duty for at least 10 years. It's just too easy, too expected. Find another song!

What did you think? Are you glad the Walkers are back, or do they drive you around the bend or both?) Which family member is most likely to make you throw things at the television? Which Walker was the most objectionable this episode? 

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