Premierewatch: 'Burn Notice' back with a bang

Burn Notice is back, and all is right with the world. Well, not for Michael's world -- he's consigned to being the ass-kicking errand boy for some mysterious voice on the phone, but it's right in my world, because Michael's discomfiture is loads of fun to watch.

Hello, Michael. We need you to eliminate some spoilers.

When last we saw our reluctant antihero, he drove into a semi parked on a bridge between tiny islands of the Florida Keys. And that's still where he is when we pick back up, and he's bored out of his mind. Fortunately, some big bangs (first spectacular explosions of the season! Whoo!) notify him that the wait is over. Smoky-voice chick ("Call me Carla") tells Michael he needs to return something to them -- a guy named Jimmy, who was supposed to steal some data for the Powers that Be. Then he tried to escape. That didn't go over well with Carla and her organization -- the kidnapped his family and demand that Michael help Jimmy carry out his task. First order of business: Escape the cops that are responding to the 911 call Jimmy placed before he was nabbed. This leads the first car chase of the season! Wheee!

Once Michael convinces a clearly wigged-out Jimmy he's there to help, it's time for the Cunning Plans portion of the evening. Michael puts on an accent (presumably South African? Something like that?) to convince the security consultant (the title helpfully translates that to "mercenary") he's a legit client. Sam and Fiona get spotted as Michael's backup, so Michael needs to improvise -- which he does by shooting at them, making it look like they're out to get him, not working with him. Sam was nonplussed, but Fi was far too willing to play along. The good news? She's an amazing shot, so she can make it look like she's really trying to hit him while not actually drawing blood. The bad news? She's still pissed enough at Michael to place at least one shot right between Michael's legs. Hee!

Once Michael has scoped out the firm's security measures, it's time for part two of the cunning plan: The Break-in. Unfortunately, Jimmy needs to come with Michael to steal the data, and Jimmy's just not as good at this. He gets the data, but accidentally sets off the alarm (curse that irrational exuberance!) leading to some large guns, a quick rappel down the side of the building, and a getaway. Of course, Ryder saw the escape, so Jimmy's in big, big trouble.

Here's where Carla comes in handy -- she delivers the guns that were used to kill the people surrounding Jimmy during his abortive escape. Michael lures Ryder and his goons to an abandoned boat, while Fi plants the guns in Ryder's truck. Jimmy is initially terrified as he stalls Ryder, but he gets into the spirit of things, demanding that Ryder strip to prove he has no weapons. Ryder won't comply, but it doesn't matter -- Michael blows up the boat Ryder thought Jimmy was on, and the ATF, alerted by Jimmy's cell phone use, appear in time to arrest Ryder and goons for being heavily armed villains transporting guns used in a major murder. Jimmy escapes to Argentina to join his now freed family.

But things aren't over for Michael -- Carla informs him he'll keep working for Them, whoever they are. Michael insists they meet, and they do, after a fashion -- she lets Sam put the moves on her in a bar, then walks out, calling Michael after the fact to let him know he juuuuust missed her. She leaves a completed crossword with a message: Enjoy the puzzle. I'll see you soon.

Highlights, thoughts and odds and ends

• Can I just say how wonderful it is to see Jeffrey Donovan again? He combines perfect dry comic timing with realistic ass-kicking action. Plus, he's seriously easy on the eyes. (Yes, I'm shallow.)
• Fiona is mightily pissed when she first appears: She thought Michael was dead or gone forever, and now he swans back asking for help with a job? Could he at least have started the phone message off with "Hi, I'm alive"? "I thought the fact that I was calling covered that," Michael replies. No wonder Fi tried to deck him.
• Oh, how I love Michael's mom. Sharon Gless is perfect, worrying, nagging, and driving Michael crazy. She demands he come over to the house to deal with a "major disaster" which turns out to be an Eisenhower-era coffee machine that burned out. Then she admits her real motives -- she's terrified now that she knows what Michael really does? See, mom? This is why I never told you, why I fell off the face of the planet -- to protect you! I'm sorry. Mom nods, sucks on a cigarette, then moans "Well it still doesn't explain why you didn't write!"
• Fi and Michael finally have their talk, and Fi walks away -- You left, you didn't choose me. I can't stay in a quasi-relationship with you, but I'll still be happy to blow things up as necessary. I like Fi, but sometimes she grates. When things are exploding, it's officially not time to talk about the state of the relationship.
• I'll always love Sam, no matter what he does. His joy at hearing Michael returned the Caddy, followed by his horror when he saw the actual state of the car, was priceless.
• Tricia Helfer! Joy! She's Michael's probably evil handler, and I can't wait to see more of her.

Helpful Hints from Michael:

• If you need to take an airbag-equipped car through the trees and you don't want a face full of nylon, use reverse. Sucks for anyone in the trunk, but you won't set off the airbag.
• If you happen to need to cut through the concrete floor of an office above your target, make sure you anchor the slab so it doesn't plummet through the ceiling and to the floor below.
• In a pinch, a wool blanket and a reflective sheet can fool motion, heat and noise detectors, provided you move slowly and don't get carried away with the victory arms.
• Need to destroy a bank of computers? Use quadrangle buckshot. For hardened secure glass, use a Frag 12.

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