Finalewatch: 'Top Chef: Chicago' picks a winner

The Triumphant Triumvirate have to make the meal of their lives tonight on Top Chef: Chicago, four courses of deliciousness from soup to nuts. Actually, it's a fish course, a poultry course, a red meat course and a dessert, but both soup and nuts come into play. So does arrogance, second-guessing, jitters, overthinking and the dreaded choke. Bon apetit!

This spoiler is  happily digesting.

The final cheftestants are lucky enough to get culinary-star sous chefs for the final challenge -- but who will have first pick of the minions? That honor will go to the chef who has won the most elimination challenges. Richard and Stephanie are tied at four apiece (yet another way Lisa is just not in their league), and Richard graciously allowed Stephanie to draw the first knife. Stephanie wins the knife-pull (which sounds like some sort of horrible euphemisms, doesn't it?), and picks Eric Ripert as her sous chef. Richard chooses Dan Barber, which means April Bloomfield is stuck with Lisa. Sorry, April.

But chef Bloomfield actually seems fine with it, and Lisa is suddenly Shiny Happy Chef -- she LOVES April!  She LOVES cheffery! She LOVES everything! If you're happy, your food is going to taste better," Lisa burbles. I suppose that explains why her dishes have sucked these last several weeks.

Richard brought liquid nitrogen as his special ingredient, and he starts experimenting with making frozen sauce pearls for one of his dishes. The culinary bigwigs gather 'round and watch Richard work. Lisa is unimpressed: "I cook simple food and I keep minimal ingredients instead of overthinking things," she sniffs. Cut to chef Ripert saying "The day you stop learning anymore is the day you're such an egomaniac you're blind." Thanks, editors!

Stephanie gets a little wiggy with her prep work, asking chef Ripert half-jokingly if he knew how to filet a fish, then hovering over him to see if he was doing it to her specs. She knows she's being a dork, but she's also determined to make sure everything is just what she wants. I think that's awesome.

The next day, the cheftestants return to the kitchen and find their sous chefs have disappeared. No more help! Richard starts to panic a bit. When Tom stops by to ask  about his menu, Richard says "It's a little abstract..." and then nothing, because he's got nothing else to say. Ouch.

Lisa shows off how calm, cool and collected she is -- she's not tense! Anyone who is tense just isn't Top Chef material, she seems to say. Shut up, Lisa. Meanwhile, Stephanie is slightly freaked about her dessert, a ricotta cheesecake. She worries aloud, and Lisa tells her to have a little confidence in herself. Dammit, Lisa -- don't make me agree with you! It's very disconcerting!

Dinner is served! Joining the regular judges and the sous chefs are top Puerto Rican chef Alfredo Ayala and Tim Zagat of Zagat guides fame. I will now have to fight the urge to put "random phrases" in "seemingly superfluous" quotation marks. Oops.

Richard decides to get cutesy and whimsical with his dishes, naming them things like "Which came first" (the guinea hen or the... fois gras? I'm pretty sure they're unrelated, dude). His first dish is good, but a bit overcomplicated, according to Zagat. Things go downhill from there -- his second course is a study in falling in love with a technique to the detriment of the dish (did we really need that foam?), and the pork belly in his third course is underseasoned and not as crispy as it should be. His dessert uses the hauntingly familiar banana scallop, but at least he adds in bacon ice cream. (My inner Lisa assumes that he read my previous post where I requested it. Go me!)

Lisa... oh, crap. Lisa does well. I don't want Lisa to do well! I want her to go down in flames! But her second course, a Tom Kha Gai soup with chicken dumpling, has the judges slurping away blissfully, while her dessert, a black Thai rice pudding, also drew raves. Her first course is ok, but a bit too spicy for some, while her third course is "just pedestrian" according to Tom, and uses a sweeter version of the same sauce from her first course.

Stephanie apparently was right to be worried about her dessert -- it's nothing special, not terribly refined and a bit heavy, say the judges. Ouch. Fortunately, the other three courses go well. Her first course, sautéed red snapper, is lovely and tasty. Her second course, seared quail breast over lobster ravioli, is fine, but the leeks that accompany it are superfluous and (gulp!) completely undercooked. Fortunately, her third course, roasted lamb with mushrooms, braised pistachios, blackberry and olive tapenade, knocks people's socks off -- "It's the first time everyone at the table was using the word 'I love'," says Chef Ripert.

At the judges table, Lisa starts out confident -- no, arrogant -- and relaxed, but soon reverts to her defensive arms-crossed posture. Richard looks miserable -- I choked, he says. Tom agrees with him. Stephanie is her typical bundle of nerves, and she looks completely mortified when Tom tells her the leeks were nearly raw.

But in the end, the leeks don't matter, because Stephanie wins it all! Yay! She deserves it, and I really hope she opens another restaurant in Chicago soon. Go, Stephanie!

Highlights, thoughts and odds and ends:

• Lisa talks about how easy it is to work with chef Bloomfield -- "Our personalities are really, really similar." Bloomfield should contact her lawyer about a slander suit.
• Richard is slightly gobsmacked when everyone watches him play with his liquid nitrogen: "All of a sudden I'm doing a demonstration for the best chefs in the world.... I showed Eric Ripert something he's never seen before, and that felt great." I'm glad he got that experience, but I can't help but think that if he'd spent less time experimenting and more time coming up with a plan, he would have done better.
• Lisa says her food is "like my personality -- big, bold, spicy, sweet, salty, sour..." In my opinion, only the "sour" part applies.
• All the judges are dubious about Stephanie's third course -- braised pistachios? Combining blueberries and olives? -- but that makes the actual dish that much more impressive. She was able to surprise the judges even at this late date. Not bad.
• Richard started to lose hope when the judges pronounced his first dish, which was supposed to be "an explosion flavorwise and something that wakes up the palate," rather bland. By the time they got to his seemingly unseasoned pork belly, he knew he was sunk. He apologized at the judges table: "I feel like I choked a little bit. I think I overthought things too much. It wasn't my top performance that I've had so far." Poor guy. I do think he's got incredible talent, and I'd love to check out his place if I'm ever in Atlanta.
• Lisa's last words are typically snotty: She tells the judges she fully expects them to say "She deserves this win, she deserves to be top chef." And I've got to give it to Lisa -- in the right circumstances, she can apparently produce great food. I just can't believe anyone would want to work with her.
• Stephanie's performance at the judges table was interesting. She admits that she faltered on the dessert -- "The dish that I fell short on tonight was me second guessing myself" -- but knows when she's nailed it, giving herself a "whoo-hoo!" on the spectacular lamb dish. When Padma finally announces that she's won, Stephanie blushes bright red. It's adorable -- but even that isn't as cute as the little jig she does to celebrate her win. Hooray!

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