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After taking a night off for Miley Cyrus Gives Back, American Idol returns on Thursday (April 10) for what we're promised will be an elimination episode. How many plugs for charitable giving will we get beforehand? Here's the website, in case you've forgotten. Now on to the recap...
8:00 p.m. The results are in and American Idol is actually starting at 8 p.m. What a sweet relief after all of the 8:58 and 7:31 starts of recent weeks.
8:01 p.m. Even more guest stars and surprises? Hannah Montana? Please?
8:02 p.m. Remember last night? I do. I was watching for all 158 minutes. But just in case you've forgotten... Did we get to a googillion dollars? And can we ban Robin Williams from live performances until he gets back on the drugs? I mean, I know we're supposed to say "No," but if it'll make Williams and Dan Aykroyd funny again...
8:05 p.m. So what's the Brad Pitt-saving soundwoman's name? You can't keep showing her without giving her some real recognition.
8:05 p.m. So far, the Idol Gives Back tally is over $60 million. Good on you, America.
8:06 p.m. This Jewish recapper isn't exactly sure why the very Jesus-specific "Shout to the Lord" is getting its second performance in two nights. There are so many fine religious songs that are directed at a general, more-encompassing, all-loving "God." One of those might bring more viewers under the Idol Big Tent (we won't discuss the atheists or agnostics who might also want to watch Idol without being preached at). Uh-oh. Cue the hate e-mails.
8:13 p.m. Puberty hasn't been kind to Zack and Cody. Uh-oh. Cue more hate e-mails. I'm on a roll tonight. Anybody got a puppy for me to kick?
8:14 p.m. Hi, celebrity lip-synching montage that didn't make the cut last night (set to "I'm a Believer"). Poor Cat Deeley. She's primetime-worthy to me. Ditto with Eddie Izzard. Dr. Phil? He should stick to mid-afternoon when it's easy to concentrate on my job and avoid his existence. And Vinnie Jones? He's the Juggernaut, bitch!
8:15 p.m. There were 31 million votes cast after Tuesday's show. Who will take their place on the Ignominious Stools and who will ride out the hour in the plush comfort of the Sofa of Love? America's Nanny Brooke White is out first and Ryan lets her read her own card, guaranteeing that she's both safe and that she'll miss her sister's wedding. How about David "The Leader" Cook? After one of the best three or four episode streaks in recent memories, David has been less convincing the past two weeks. After a discussion of David's pompousness, the rocker's sent to join Brooke.
8:19 p.m. Presumptive American Idol Winner David Archuleta isn't going anywhere. That leaves three empty Ignominious Stools and five contenders waiting backstage.
8:25 p.m. On his trip to Africa, Forest Whitaker shot a lot of footage. We saw some of it last night and we get more tonight. I get it. He's a great actor and he's got a lot of atoning to do for Battlefield Earth.
8:29 p.m. Where's Melinda Doolittle at? Just curious. I have no quarrel with last season's Idol winner Jordin Sparks, who wasn't important enough for last night's show, but who pops up singing a heavily synthesized single with former O.C. guest star Chris Brown.
8:33 p.m. Four fans bring out a pair of platinum records for downloads of two singles, plus a gold album for her debut CD. This is a direct retaliation against the naysayers who have questioned the success of recent winners. I know this because Seacrest ends the segment with the very imperative pronouncement, "Idol works!" Now stop talking about all of those recent favorites without record deals!
8:37 p.m. The week's Ford commercial gets arty, as the Top Eight throw pain at each other in the Los Angeles River to the tune of "I Just Want to Celebrate" They make the Earth at the end. Groovy.
8:39 p.m. After a brief and fruitless discussion of the high cost of ukuleles in today's ukulele-hostile marketplace, Jason Castro is through to the Top Seven, taking the news with the same goofy smile he reserves for, well, everything. How about Kristy Lee Cook? She was one of the surprise stars of Tuesday's subpar show. Looking lovely in blue and professing nervousness at every turn, Kristy is spun off to the couch. That means Syesha Mercado, Michael Johns and Carly Smithson are the Bottom Three.
8:41 p.m. I guess I'd have preferred somebody other than Michael to be there, but the other two were no-brainer picks for the Ignominious Stools.
8:45 p.m. It's former American Idol Audience Elephant Jim Carrey. He urges us to give more money. You know why? Because Bono isn't satisfied yet. I admire Bono, but who made him the arbiter of when Americans have been sufficiently generous? And as an Irishman, he's also the only guy properly suited to introduce by-the-numbers messages from Sen. Hillary Clinton, Sen. Barack Obama and Sen. John McCain. Since Obama and Clinton aren't allowed to show vulnerability until the Democratic nomination is settled, the only candidate capable of making a joke is McCain, whose crack about Florida and Michigan voters is actually funny.
8:49 p.m. Randy thinks the Bottom Three is pretty surprising. In what way, Randall? Paula agrees that the Bottom Three is "partly right, partly wrong." As always, Simon insists that America is listening to him.
8:53 p.m. Elimination time! Syesha and Carly... are safe. We were due for a big surprise in the voting and tonight we get one. Michael Johns is done.
8:54 p.m. Ryan gives Michael a few seconds of hope by reminding viewers that nobody went home in last year's Idol Gives Back week. This year? No such luck. Simon and Randy are stern and disapproving. Paula is aghast. After several weeks of singers who were resigned to their fates, Michael admits to being surprised.
8:57 p.m. I didn't think Michael was at his best on Tuesday, but this was nowhere close to his time to go. Randy urges him to keep on rocking. Paula's such a big fan and she tells him to get on with his career. Even Simon says he'll miss him.
8:58 p.m. Michael goes into the audience to sing his good-bye song. By my count, at least one of the remaining men and three or four of the women should have been gone first.
Agree? Disagree? What do you think went wrong with Michael?
And, as always, check out Zap2it's Guide to American Idol.
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Completely wrong elimination. It is unbelievable that those phonies, Carly & Syesha, are safe. Not to mention the horrible Kristy Lee and the little pipsqueak AKA David Archuleta.
They really need to change the voting process so one's votes are limited and little teenyboppers can't pad the votes.
While I was never a huge fan of Michael Johns I was definitely not ready for him to go so soon, especially as it means I have to listen to KLC and Syesha rather than him.
After the second week of semifinals I was pretty ready to see almost all of the women gone before the men this year and it totally has not gone that way at all. Pity.
The funniest part of this article is the headline referring to Michael Johns as a "rocker."
I'm surprised that he's gone but then again..this kinda "shocker" happens just about every season. Everyone will forget about this in a couple weeks...
I liked Michael (somewhat) but like I said the other day, his mouthiness did not appeal to anyone.
I wonder what song the Top 8 woulda sung for the ensemble if one of the contestants was a COMPLETELY different religion. Either way I can't complain about the song =)
And by the way, Chris Brown & Jordin sung way worse than Carly did Tuesday
cannot believe this show! i sincerely believe this is rigged!! michael johns gone, but KLC still safe?? what is wrong with this picture!!
Also, Ryan should be replace. He is outright rude, especially towards Simon. Even though they say its all good between them, can't help but noticed he actually believes what he says about Simon!
and what he did to Michael John was extremely cruel!
Nigel, get a new host!
Definately the wrong choie America. Michael has a far better stage presence than some(the Arch) and also a great voice. Michael you will be missed.
God when is KLC going home? David C. was lucky b/c his performance last week was pathetic. We'll miss sexy Michael Johns..
my guess...KLC (crosses fingers) is next to get the Idol axe.
Any of them could've gotten knocked off this week however I think Ryan giving Michael those "few seconds of hope" was a totally cl***less move. Good thing they didn't send Ryan to Africa. He probably would've have dangled food in front of those starving kids only to say to you can't have it.
I would prefer listening to Michael Johns than the other 2 women at the bottom. What bugs me is the cheap shot Ryan took at Johns by making the crack that last year AI did not have an eliminaton during "AI Gives Back," but not this year! Boom. What a punch to the heart. Another contestant to the ER with palpitations after that low blow. It's just as I thought AI doesn't have a heart. This is all for shock and awe to gain more viewers. Do they really care about Giving Back? I want to believe that they do but it is hard, very hard. It's time for Seacrest to go.
Was it just me, or did it look like Carly was trying to force herself to look sad and crying over Michael's elimination? Normally when someone is genuinely upset, their bottom lip will be quivering. Her whole facial demeanor, to me, looked forced and phony.