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'American Idol' Results: Hello Dolly, Good-Bye...
How did the great Satchel Paige used to say it? Don't look back, American Idol might be gaining on you? Wednesday's bloated Idol result shows just keep on sneaking deeper and deeper into the 8 p.m. hour and this week's (April 2) episode manages to start at 8:57 p.m. ET. How did we spend our hour before elimination? Well, let's see...
8:58 p.m. ET Ryan Seacrest promises a jam-packed hour including performances by Dolly Parton, the Clark Brothers and... shudder... viewer questions. Repeating the same action over and over again and expecting a different result may not actually be a definition for "insanity," but it's mighty stupid.
8:58 p.m. After being spared individual covering last night, "9-to-5" is tonight's Group Sing accompanied by some mighty half-hearted line-dancing from the Idol singers who aren't Brooke White. Ramiele Malubay has a microphone malfunction, Jason "Clifford the Muppet" Castro has a conniption fit and Kristy Lee Cook's two or three lines are sassy and sexy enough to make me wish she'd be able to do this one on Tuesday. The performance goes from the stage out into the crowd and I believe I can speak for all in Idol-dom when I say what a relief it is to see David "The Leader" Cook seeming healthy and palpitation free.
9:04 p.m. Dolly Parton Night. It seems like it was only yesterday. "That was the show," Ryan says after the clips. Thanks.
9:07 p.m. Ah, the Sofa of Paradise and the Stools of Devastation. Who will go to each side? Well, Aussie bluesman Michael Johns was among last night's best, so he gets the first shot at the comfy couch. Presumptive American Idol Winner David Archuleta found yet another song that touched him last night and he, in turn, touched America. But not in an inappropriate way. Thankfully. Ick. He's safe, OK. Safe! David and Michael exchange the world's most ungainly hug.
9:09 p.m. Ryan teases Carly Smithson by letting her state a preference between safety or 50 minutes of torture. She indicates she'd just as soon not go to the stools and she's then surprised when Ryan accepts her preference. I'm actually a little surprised myself.
9:14 p.m. Well, at least we're getting the viewer questions out of the way early. Syesha Mercado's asked what she misses from home. She says her family, which is enlightening. David Cook says he wishes he were more organized. Randy's asked if there's anybody he hasn't worked with and he'd like to. He says he'd like to work with this season's winner, who he speculates will either be a boy or a girl.
9:16 p.m. OK. This is so bad I'd rather watch the Yankees game than listen to any more questions. I return in time to hear Simon apologize for apologizing after criticisms.
9:16 p.m. Never again? Please?
9:17 p.m. The evening's first performance comes from the Clark Brothers, who several dozen viewers will recall won FOX's The Next Great American Band. Fans of TNGAB liked to emphasize that just because the show's ratings were low even by FOX Friday standards, the series showcased some actual musicianship. I can't argue, especially if the point of comparison is Jason Castro's dorm room strum-n-wince.
9:21 p.m. Set to "It's Tricky," this week's Ford commercial features some of the least convincing body-double work I've ever seen to try to make us buy that our Top 9 wouldn't get humiliated on a basketball court. The only Idol contender who looks believable in a sporting context is Kristy. I take that back. I totally buy David Archuleta blowing a whistle as a ref.
9:22 p.m. Ryan brings David Cook to the stage and leads a discussion of the medical emergency that David insists was "blown out of proportion." David's gestured over to the couch. Clutching her hands to her neck like a nervous little girl, Ramiele couldn't look smaller or less at ease. She's the first in the Bottom Three, after several weeks of inexcusable safety. Kristy is next, holding a carefully lettered sign that reads "Kristy's Seat," expecting another turn in jeopardy. The note proves prescient, as she marches off to the Kristy Lee Cook Bottom Three Stool, which was filled by somebody else's bottom last week.
9:25 p.m. Paula thinks that both Kristy and Ramiele, sticking out her lower lip in disappointment, had good nights on Tuesday.
9:29 p.m. Nashville has been good to American Idol, as Bucky Covington, Phil Stacey and Bo Bice try to emphasize. Actually, Bo tries to emphasize that he's had a hard time, but he hasn't been a failure. He's been sick and building himself back up. I hadn't realized that Bo had a second album out. I only barely realized he had a first album out.
9:33 p.m. Who will join Ramiele and Kristy? It won't be Syesha. But it will be either America's Nanny or Clifford the Muppet. Brooke takes out her ruler and tries to make Simon apologize for snubbing her violinist last night. But is that exactly the shtick that America's tiring of? Brooke's in the Bottom Three and, as is her way, she assures both Ryan and America that it's OK. The sight gag of Ramiele standing between the two blonde Amazons looking up and making funny faces is the sort of thing that makes me wish I knew how to do a screen capture.
9:36 p.m. Simon's a bit awe-struck that American got the right Bottom Three. Feeling contrite, Simon also tries to explain to Carly that he thinks she's cute and he meant for his criticisms of her fashion choices to be helpful.
9:42 p.m. Your Idol Gives Back money helped a little Ethiopian girl find her sister in Addis Ababa. I have no joke here. Think about giving next week, eh?
9:44 p.m. Hello, Dolly. Last night's episode actually had me looking into buying a couple old Parton albums. Tonight's performance makes sure that I won't be buying the new one.
9:48 p.m. She ends with a whoop of, "Halleluyah... Simon, how are ya!" Dolly's a hoot.
9:54 p.m. We've finally killed enough time. Randy guesses that Ramiele is out. Simon just says it won't be Brooke, who's still in tears from the Idol Gives Back footage and Dolly. Brooke's so sincere that Ryan can't help but send her to safety.
9:55 p.m. Kristy will be around for another week, meaning Ramiele's going home. Kristy holds Ramiele close for a long hug. I suspect that the embrace is about giving the younger girl the chance to regain her composure. If that's the case, it's a pretty sweet gesture.
9:57 p.m. We don't have to hear anything more about the nefarious pinoy conspiracy keeping Ramiele around. She's probably been due to depart for several weeks, but it was never possible to begrudge her protracted presence. Oh lo.
9:58 p.m. The remaining Idol women (and, um, David Cook) gather behind Ramiele to provide support for her last performance. The rest of the men join in.
Whew. We made it through another week. Do you agree with the way the vote went? Will you miss Ramiele?
And check out Zap2it's Guide to American Idol...
Ramiele is so cute. Too bad her song choices were horrible, she could have done well as she has a great voice. Should have sung "I will always love you".
we love you ramiele!
aj | Apr 2, 2008 7:34:31 PM | #I thought Dolly was great!!! She is so sweet! what a great song, too! I am going out tomorrow and buying "Backwoods Barbie" - her new CD...the show was great all the way through (except for the boy-band thing!)
Jayden | Apr 2, 2008 7:34:49 PM | #Kristy should have been voted off, not Ramiele!
V | Apr 2, 2008 7:43:14 PM | #we'll miss ramielle. she's got a great voice. undeniable.Daniel Fienberg your comment about Ramielle being around for weeks sounds racist.
| Apr 2, 2008 7:43:25 PM | #I did not enjoy Dolly singing, but she sure is a hoot, I love her personality. I am glad Ramiele is gone, because she really did need to go. I was really surprised that Brooke was in the bottom three, and not Jason Castro.
Nancy | Apr 2, 2008 7:44:05 PM | #I can't stand Kristy Lee Cook. She seriously needs to go. She's annoying and she's really not that great of a singer.
| Apr 2, 2008 7:49:29 PM | #Hey anonymous coward, in what way is the statement "She's probably been due to depart for several weeks, but it was never possible to begrudge her protracted presence" racist?
Gavin | Apr 2, 2008 7:52:00 PM | #i think ramielle should've won the american idol, i think simon and MR DANIEL should try to sing so you guys know how it feels how to be up there and be judged by people, STOP RACISM!!!
| Apr 2, 2008 7:53:13 PM | #The nice thing about your recaps is that I can read them a couple hours before the show actually airs here (Seattle area) and not bother watching all the dreck. Only thing worth watching that you mentioned would be the Clark Bros.
(Yes, I'm one of the 'dozens' who watched NGAB and thought it was 10x better the AI has ever been. I'm also one of the 8 people who watched On the Lot (up to the last few episodes, when I gave up)...but let's pretend I didn't admit that, ok?)
Umm, thanks a whole lot for the spoiler, guys. You know, some of us here on the West Coast also watch Idol. And when we go to this webpage to find out what time the results show starts, we don't expect to see a photo of the singer voted off and hour before the show even starts here. Duh.
West Coast Idol Watcher | Apr 2, 2008 8:05:02 PM | #So, Rami is out. How is that racist? She didnt sing well, thats why she's gone. Frankly when was the last time she did? When Chik was voted out, was that racist too? Give me a break! Unfortunately this contest is based on popularity, not talent. It should be judged like "America's Top Model" with a panel of qualified judges who are in the music industry. The top ones if you are voting on talent are: Carly, David Cook, Michael, and Syesha, and possibly Brooke. Every modeling agency in the US is hoping Kristy gets booted so they can sign her up. Every resort in Jamaica is hoping Jason gets booted so he can come sing in their lounge. And every hotel in Branson is wanting little David to get booted. Doesnt matter for David Cook or Michael, they have the talent and looks (Michael), so theyll be ok. Carly though, and Syesha, will benefit if they win. They need to win.
Sissers | Apr 2, 2008 8:31:51 PM | #I forgot to record the show tonight, so reading the recap was necessary for info not just snarks (which I do enjoy, unlike a lot of the other readers).
No complaints about who went home, any of the bottom 3 going home would have been ok with me - i.e. I won't miss any of them once they are gone.
Unlike the other shows I missed tonight, I wouldn't bother to look up a results show to view in its entirety tomorrow. That's beyond insane. Besides, it's not like I watch the result shows in their entirety when I do record them.
Rishi | Apr 2, 2008 8:47:59 PM | #A Brooke backlash may be building. She's just sooo goody two-shoes and also feels the need to reply to everything everyone says.
That said, though, Kristy needs to go. If she's going to do stuff like making signs to reserve her seat in the Bottom Three, then people should accommodate her and just vote her on out altogether.
With "Idol Gives Back" next week, I really doubt anyone will be sent home next Wednesday.
This just proves that the audience is made up of girls (who vote for the cute guys) and gays (who also vote for the cute guys). Very few straight guys watch American Idol, and the fact that cute girls would end up where they did prove that fact.
Gnillob802 | Apr 2, 2008 9:08:31 PM | #Elimiation will be on Thursday next week.
Bryan | Apr 2, 2008 10:08:16 PM | #It is too bad she was truly brilliant only during Hollywood week and the week of Top24. I'm very sad about that.
However, I am very proud of her because she always acknowledged her Filipino heritage every chance she got. Quite unlike Jasmine Trias who was clearly filipino but never once mentioned it. And then, hypocritically made millions during her brief celebrity stint in the Philippines. I would not mind at all if and when Ramiele though end up doing the same thing. She has the right.
Hold your head high Ramiele, all the Filipinos around the world are proud of you. Thank you!
(PS Nefarious Pinoy conspiracy? Be cautious!)
Ritchie | Apr 2, 2008 10:16:31 PM | #I'm jealous of Ramiele after that hug she got from KLC.
Tr | Apr 2, 2008 11:18:05 PM | #i think KLC should go home first before ramiele...
i know that ramiele will not win because of her poor song choice... but KLC should really go... she was never out of that bottom three...
| Apr 2, 2008 11:58:08 PM | #You'd think the music producers might have slowed that "9 to 5" group sing down just a little bit when they realized that NONE of the contestants could actually get the words out on time! Is it just me or have the group sings been especially painful this season? I loved it when Amanda held the mic up, but didn't open her mouth during those things. Her cynicism was slightly refreshing.
Too bad for Ramielle, but she really didn't connect on any of her Top 12 songs... and she butchered the Beatles' "In My Life," which is maybe the greatest song of all time.
Who will Kristy Lee defeat next time?
Cat | Apr 3, 2008 12:34:09 AM | #I'm a little sad for Ramiele, because I think she had a lot of talent but was unsure of what to do with it. I think she was a true underdog, one of the few amateurs in a season packed with former recording artists and reality-talent show contestants. The themes really didn't help her either. If she had sang some of the songs that Syesha was singing ("Yesterday" and "I Will Always Love You" in particular), she might have fared better. She should have at least outlasted Kristy Lee, who I don't think has given one decent performance the entire competition.
Dennis | Apr 3, 2008 12:53:55 AM | #Man don't you voters know that every week Kristy stays her chances of doing a Playboy pictorial goes down. I have a chart if any one wants to see it.
Seriously Ramiel should have gone home weeks ago. Probably four weeks ago before the top 12. Berfor Chikezie, Before Amanda, Before Alaina, Possibly even before Kady Malloy. THe only thing keeping her around was the cute short thing. Her performances were all either boring or amateurish.
Just a quick note for next week. If you have a daughter between ages 8-12 forbid them from voting for Archuleta. I can't stand another creepy performance from that kid. Or maybe put a sedative in their ice cream around 8:30 so they fall asleep before voting starts. (Just kidding about the sedative.)
Jason S. | Apr 3, 2008 1:09:29 AM | #Thrilled that Ramielle finally made the bottom three (where she has belonged FOR WEEKS), and, even better, got voted off the island. Pure karaoke. Goodbye, and say hello to Danny.
vncntdl | Apr 3, 2008 4:28:59 AM | #Still waiting to see Kristy Lee sing her final song. She's pretty but just doesn't have it - nothing unigue and as Simon so eloguently puts it, "forgettable". Jason's face can keep him in the top for a long time but let's face it - as for talent, versatility, style and class it's David Cook. He can do it all and humble to boot. That 17 year old has a great voice but he's young - there's lots of time for him to shine.
Gail | Apr 3, 2008 5:13:35 AM | #"Strum-n-wince"!! I love it, so true...
Ramiele was, I think, one of THE best women singers, esp at the beginning of the competition. I think her nerves may have gotten the best of her. She's a fantastic singer and made it in a tough competition. She should be proud of herself.
Next week: I think Kristy Lee or Brooke may be on their way out.
Caro | Apr 3, 2008 5:22:22 AM | #
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