'American Gladiators': Does there have to be a winner?
After watching two hours of American Gladiators last night I was moderately worried that an hour tonight would be overkill. I was worried that tonight would prove to be too much of a good thing. It wasn't.
To be sure, Hulk Hogan was still just as wooden a host as last night, and the competition wasn't quite, well, competitive enough. But it was still good fun. Unless they had some new twists in later rounds it may not continue to be though.
The night started off with Jeff (radiation control technician) in the Gauntlet. Does being a radiation control technician make him into a real life Homer Simpson? He certainly ran the Gauntlet like I imagine Homer would, he sort of flopped and fell and while he managed to come out on top, earning 8 out of a possible 10 points, he did it ugly. Adonis (an engineer at Boeing) earned the same 8 points, sort of.
There was a little bit of controversy with Adonis's run in the Gauntlet as he passed Justice, got his points for passing Justice, and yet Justice wouldn't let him up. Adonis was initially awarded only 8 points despite the fact that he would certainly have had enough time to break through the wall to get the full complement of points had Justice let him up. Adonis protested the result and was eventually awarded the last two points.
Adonis may have fared better in the first task on the men's side, but the next two events belonged to Jeff. He climbed the Wall with ridiculous speed while Adonis ended up pulled into the drink by Toa. We found then that in Earthquake the contestant can fall off the platform and still get a perfect score as long as the gladiator goes with him, as Jeff scored 10 points there too. Adonis was left point free in the event because ripping off half of Militia's shorts before falling off the platform doesn't actually count as scoring in Gladiator World (seems as though that's a different game entirely). For their last pre-Eliminator event, Adonis was able to avoid Wolf in Hang Tough, getting 10 points in the process. Jeff however ended up with naught but a wet uniform.
Despite not scoring in Hang Tough, Jeff still had a four second head start in the Eliminator. He had a little bit of trouble at the first obstacle, the 8 foot wall, but was able to extend his lead on the cargo net. In the end though, it all came down to the Travelator as neither man could make it to the top. They both struggled on it for over a minute before Adonis finally made it up. The announcer called it a "fantastic finish," but I think "embarrassment" may be a more accurate term.
They should have just disqualified both men. Or, at the very least, they should have turned off the conveyor belt and just had the two contestants sprint each other to the finish. It would have served them right, neither of them should feel good about their performance.
On the women's side, Christie (Karate instructor) was up first. She was utterly brutalized by the gladiators and actually resorted to trying to kick Siren in the face. After tangling for a while, Siren seemed to just give up on Christie, practically just letting her pass. Thank goodness Hellga was there right behind Siren to smack Christie in the face. Christie's opponent, Siene (a gymnastics coach) managed to get passed the mountainous Hellga for the full 10 points.
During Joust, Christie fell in the water, earning a big old zero. She should actually consider herself lucky because she didn't take the sort of brutal punishment Crush gave Siene. Crush delivered at least a half-dozen good shots to Siene's head before finally knocking Siene into the water. In Hang Tough Christie didn't fare any better than Joust. She fell into the water at the last possible second, ending up with no points. Siene on the other hand went across without a problem. She never even got touched by Venom. Their Assault runs were lackluster, with Christie earning only one point to Siene's two.
Siene ended up with a 7.5 second head start in the Eliminator. It would be more than enough. Actually, Siene would have beaten Christie even if Christie had the 7.5 second head start. Simply stated, Christie did not look good.
My thoughts and a quote or two:
- Is it me or is it terrible that they cut to commercial breaks as the contenders are lined up and ready for an event to start? I know that it doesn't bother the contestants because those breaks are just for us at home, but they're oh-so-very annoying.
- Stealth looked horrific tonight. She only appeared in Gauntlet, and she just sort of stood there and let both the contestants pass her.
- Jeff on his tactic on the Wall, "I was just thinkin' back to childhood, you know, when I would get in trouble my momma would chase me with the belt, so I was just tryin' to get up the tree like I did when I was a kid. And so that's all I could do.
- The announcer's introduction of Militia tonight was ridiculous, did you catch it? He used the tired, horrific, pick-up line, "welcome to the gun show." It doesn't work on women, why would it work on the home viewer?
- Finally, after two nights, I've selected my favorite gladiator, Crush. Who's yours (and it's no fair answering Zap or Nitro)?
Well, it's time for me to go lay the smackdown on some other stories over at The TV and Film Guy's Reviews. Until next time.
Is it fair to answer Ice or Diamond?
One word: CRUSH
Nough said.
Crush is Gina Carano. Gina is a MMA fighter for Elite XC. She (like Laila Ali for Women's Boxing) is the face of Women's MMA. She is one of the company's top draws and will be on their next PPV in Feb. (I believe on Feb. 16)
You're right about the commercials. AG has no programming flow and, as one watches it for the "cheese", it will likely die an early death because of the klutzy editing. I don't see why all shows must now utilize the tedious American Idol "right after the break" technique. It's insulting to the viewers and the heightened suspense it's supposed to generate is actually anti-climatic.
At least it picks up right where it left off before the break.
The Biggest Loser, for some strange reason feels the need to recap the scene it showed right before the commerical break. Just in case you missed or thought it was so exciting you just had to see it again. Now that gets old fast.
I don't relaly know how I feel about the show as of yet. I agree that the hosts are not the greatest. I guess when you grow up on the ol' school stuff, you have high expectations when the newbies come in. I think the fact that they incorporated water into the events is pretty cool. The Eliminator I must say, is quite interesting. What's up with that barrel roll? If the show survives more than a year...it has got to go! I feel like there's too much trash talking on both ends - gladiator and contestant and the show is less so about the competition. The Old Gladiators were fierce, but not scary and that to me is the difference. I watch it, because it's entertaining and because I've been waiting all year (and some of last year) for it, so I will continue to be loyal to the show.
All we've learned so far is that the lead you get going into the Eliminator means absolutely nothing. Almost all the runs have been close up til the Travelator which in itself doesn't look that difficult but your legs must be jelly by the time you get to it.
I enjoyed the new AG so far. The problem is that next week 'Prison Break' should be back on and I will be watching that instead.