From the pilot, Dr. Gregory House has always operated under one major rule: People lie. That rule got modified in Tuesday (Nov. 13) night's episode to include the observation that "cameras make people act."

[If you read this recap without seeing the episode, you may get ticked off.]

Even the best of shows have formulas and nobody would deny that for most of its first three seasons, House had a very strict formula that allowed some viewers to think they could anticipate the rhythms of every episode. As a result, the show's fourth season has been dedicating to dodging the formula, whether through the introduction of House's potential new team or through gimmick episodes. After last week's in-office/out-of-office gimmick episode, this week went a step further.

The premise was that a film crew was following this week's patient, a teenage with massive cranial deformities, to the hospital where he was supposed to undergo major surgery to make him look "normal." When the patient had a cardiac arrest on the operating table, House was called in and the film crew decided to stick around and watch the Good Doctor at work, which upset both House and Cuddy ("You think I want the whole world watching as you check out my ass and question my wardrobe?"), though Cuddy saw past the inconveniences to the potential PR windfall. The supposed point was that House's candidates were so busy playing to the cameras that they forgot to be doctors, but that really didn't end up being much of an issue.

Sometimes gimmicks work, but in this case, the gimmick didn't completely work for me. If you're going to build an episode around a film crew pursuing House, keeping the documentary aesthetic throughout is almost essential. The skipping between black and white and color just so that we could see the things House didn't want the camera crew to see was a cheat that really only paid off at the end when a frustrated House saw that he was edited into looking like an altruistic hero and stormed out, declaring, "Suddenly I don't feel I can trust Michael Moore movies."

It was also jarring that the color episode's stylistics mirrored the cheesiness of the documentary, in ways that I'm not convinced were intentional. The beautifully silhouetted slo-mo father-son walk through the tunnel at the beginning, for example, was every bit as cloying as the deceptive editing in the film. Also, were they only shooting in black & white to pay homage to Freddie Francis' cinematography from The Elephant Man?

That doesn't mean that I didn't enjoy watching House show off his meta-understanding of not just the filmmaking process, but of televisual storytelling as well. He knew what angles to be shot at (seriously) and what room colors brought out his eyes (jokingly), but he also knew more specific things. A few quality quotes:

"Walks look good on camera. They give the illusion of the story moving forward."

"What are you two doing here?" "Skipping three scenes."

And, best of all:

"Shame you're going for a theatrical release, vomiting blood would have made a great Act Out." (after the patient vomiting blood was, indeed, what is known in script writing parlance as an ACT OUT, going into commercial).

And the 'shippers will be happy that the documentary camera, in addition to generating lies, has been known to make people things they wouldn't say otherwise, like Cameron declaring "I love Dr. House" ("He was always simulating. Not in an erotic sense...") and then rehearsing her retraction in front of both the mirror and Chase. Does anybody else think we're getting too many of these direct nods to relationship fabulists?

The last thing I need to get out (having nothing to do with the episode's gimmick, having to do with the main diagnosis): I was always taught that when you're out in the wilderness and you're feeling like you may have run afoul of ticks, you might glance at your body, but otherwise, you should always check your scalp, because ticks fall in your hair, burrow down and... BINGO! Lyme Disease. We're now on our second medical drama of the season (Scrubs was the other, if you're not watching) to have supposedly informed doctors repeatedly dismissing a Lyme Disease diagnosis because they can't see the tick-produced bulls-eye, only to find the target under the patient's hair. Is there a Lyme Disease foundation that's paying to turn these shows into PSAs and paying to make doctors look stupid? For Dr. House -- a doctor prone to discovering maladies not seen on this continent since the Pilgrims -- to fail to think that a tick mark could be under a patient's hair is intolerably inconsistent with what we know about the character (I'm more likely to buy J.D. or Dr. Cox being that scatter-brained).

Anyway, enough of that. For the second or third straight episode, House was so glutted with amusing one-liners (and quick back-and-forths) that I don't have the space to list them all.

Here are a few of my favorites (but feel free to add your own):

"I became a doctor because of the movie Patch Adams."

"Forget the deformity. Treat the patient like he's any other really, really, really ugly kid."

"How many lives have been lost because of pretty girls?"

"You're a lucky boy. Anywhere else in the animal kingdom, your parents would have eaten you at birth."

"Thirteen's pretty" "Thirteen killed someone" "The b**** is pretty" "The b**** is a b****" (House and Wilson going back and forth on the dating prospects amongst his candidates)

"You get a gold Star of David..." (House to Taub, just in case anybody thinks Big Love is the only one being singled out for his religion)

"You're keeping him because he's a philanderer? Where do I sign up?" "Ask the Mormon." (Kutner and House)

"Some people pop pain pills. I cheat. We all have our vices." (Taub to House, admitting the secret that caused him to leave his former job)

I didn't discuss it, but what did you think of the two episode hire-and-fire arc for Michael Michele? Did it make a worthwhile point about House's hiring practices and his libido or was it a waste of time?

And what other quotes did you enjoy?

Comments

I started watching this show for Hugh Laurie and tolerated it until about midway through last season. Tonight the dearth of anything else to do had me giving it one more try.

I love HL, Lisa E, and Robert Sean Leonard, but this entire thing has become tedious and predictable.

Firstly, the annoying Cameron thing. Yuck. Just because one party has a crush does not make it a love affair. Why in heaven's name would she be attracted to him anyway? Unbelievably pathetic and unrealistic.

Second, his entire mistreat the patient thing is tedious and would have had more than one person punch him in the face. What kind of a creep would introduce himself to a person with a facial deformity by saying, "you are so ugly"? Dear heaven. That's not honest; that's pointlessly brutal - and to a kid no less.

Third, I actually rolled my eyes and had a Scrubs flashback when they realized they hadn't checked his scalp for a Lyme rash. Apparently medical schools are not what they used to be. Hint to all you would-be-docs out there: ticks like to hide in hair.

Fourth, how many lawsuits would this guy be facing for hiring people for their physical appearance then firing them days later? Again, no hospital could afford that.

Please, please, please, let this horrid show go off the air so that the immensely talented actors who work there can go on to better shows.

Sam | Nov 13, 2007 8:48:17 PM | #

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A couple seasons ago, they had a character on House who had a heart transplant, but was under House's care because something else was wrong (as usual)...only to find out at the end that she had a tick...down there. What's with that?

Dee | Nov 13, 2007 10:19:01 PM | #

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Dee -- I'd kinda repressed that episode... It was "Safe" from Season Two, the episode that featured Michelle Tractenberg (as the young woman with the tick bite... down there). That was an icky one. Did her diagnosis end up being Lyme Disease, too? I guess so.

They're getting into a bit of recycling at this point, between the endless Lupus guesses and using two different versions of Mirror Syndrome in less than a year.

That's probably just how it goes if you do a medical show for four seasons, though it's unclear why this week's case had to be Lyme Disease at all. It could have been anything.

-Daniel

Daniel | Nov 13, 2007 10:56:59 PM | #

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I think this season of House has the potential to be better than the 2nd season especially with the Super Bowl episode coming up.

Again, Dr. House comes out with a ton of hilarious one-liners. There was too many in this one. As for Michael Michele, I don't think it was a complete waste of time because it showed that Wilson is correct about House, that House is incapable of having a relationship with women whom he finds attractive.

I absolutely loved the end of this episode. He asks Dr. Terzi out after firing her and the twist the filmmakers put on their documentary, putting the Patch Adams comment on was golden.

I do hope 13 gets a spot and I want more of Wilson and Cuddy giving House a hard time.

Ritchie | Nov 13, 2007 10:59:21 PM | #

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This episode could have been made into a two-parter with everything that was going on between the crew and House's older gang and the new kids and the hospital staff in general (what, no shots of Blue/Lou?), plus Taub's back story crammed in there? They could have LITERALLY (*cough*) used a "To be continued" sound byte the film crew scrambled for more film.

I liked the faux-altruistic House a lot. Cuddy and House's exchange at the end was gold.

And House did "It was really Lyme disease" before -- except it was a lot funnier seeing him look at an angry father, get a deer-in-headlights expression, and immediately diving back down to continue the un-approved search.

Michael Michele leaving was a slight disappointment; she could have at least made a threat (she does have her own water board after all) or a glaring smile.

Did Wilson suggest he was "a man of loose morals" when he suggested both Terzi and Chase as measuring sticks for why Foreman wasn't going head over heels like House?

House is going blind ("Can you hold up your fingers to actually test if I'm going blind?)... and of course Wilson retorts "do you have hairy hands too?"

pakopako | Nov 14, 2007 6:44:15 AM | #

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I love this show but, I thought this episode was completely unbelievable and ridiculous. That a hospital full of doctors, especially House couldn't diagnose Lyme Disease in unfathomable. I hope the next episode and future ones get back to house knowing what he's talking about and being a doctor that other doctors only wish they could be.

Chris | Nov 14, 2007 8:45:54 AM | #

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I loved House until this year. I can't stand the contest and the sexual innuendo is becoming tedious. I keep tuning in but I'm about ready to throw in the towel. Agree totally with Chris' last sentence above.

Susan-Tampa | Nov 14, 2007 12:34:40 PM | #

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Sam makes many valid points. House could not continually escape the consequences of his rudeness in the real world. (Cuddy is an enabler!) I did stop watching the show at one point because, much as I luv Hugh Laurie, I really wanted to deck Dr. House.

They've sucked me back in with the "Survivor: New Team" thread. I want to see how it plays out. I'm rooting for #13, even if she did kill that man--and his poor dog!

She also diagnosed Lyme Disease, correctly. It's not surprising that her "competitors" might not want to support her theory over their own theories. And House had turned "stupid" over Michael Michele's character. He was doubting anything out of the mouth of an attractive woman. Okay, it's a little thin, but it does offer some explanation.

meggins | Nov 14, 2007 12:50:49 PM | #

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The Lyme disease mistake was really outrageous since most lay people are medically-aware enough to know there doesn't even have to be a rash for Lyme to exist. I know it must be really difficult to come up with a bonafide, or at least plausible, set of wrong diagnoses each week but the ultimate mystery disease should be believable. Lyme can be detected by a simple blood test and has gotten so prevalent that family doctors check for it almost routinely.
I don't get the Michael Michelle plotline at all. Are we supposed to believe that House only thinks with his 'other' head when pretty women are around? That's ridiculous since Cameron was certainly pretty (so is 13, the Bitch, and Cuddy).
Last nitpick was the backstory of Dr. Taub getting booted out of a partnership because of infidelity? Since when would a divorce, even a messy one, effect a plastic surgeons practice? That was absurd.
There were the usually litany of one-liners, some of which were very funny, but it seems to me that House has been more cruel this year and not just to his 'students'.
The best part was Wilson describing House's quirks and saying he was a Wiccan - that did crack me up.

wmeador | Nov 14, 2007 1:28:02 PM | #

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Lyme disease isn't always easily detectable in blood, because the spirochetes often reproduce inside the microphages of the immune system, meaning that no antibodies are produced (testing for antibodies is usually what's done with Lyme, because it's hard to get the bacterium to grow in culture). But yeah, the rash doesn't show up in all patients, and it's unlikely a doctor would dismiss the possibility just because they didn't see the rash. I don't recall if it was the episode 'Safe' mentioned above, but this is the second time House threw out Lyme based on no rash. Naughty naughty!

Dr. Lyme | Nov 14, 2007 3:40:30 PM | #

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Daniel-Yeah, it was 'Safe' with Michelle Tractenberg. She's actually the only reason I remember the episode. She had just gone through a heart transplant and was at home recovering in her room, which her Mom had made into a completely clean, safe room. Her boyfriend had snuck in and the tick had transferred from him to her.

Dee | Nov 14, 2007 7:39:27 PM | #

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Re: Michael Michele, I think that hire/fire arc she had was just an easy cheat so that they could keep 1 (or both) of the actors for an extra episode (or 2) before they got fired. I won't say who, since it appears that some of the regular posters on this blog don't know who they are. (Can still be accessed fairly easily I assume on this site.)

Second, re: The Superbowl episode. I'm worried that the episode wouldn't have been written prior to the strike. Considering the normal bump that House gets once American Idol returns, I was wondering how big a bump the Superbowl would give the show. Now we may never find out (as in 3 years it likely wouldn't be the same as it is now).

Rishi | Nov 15, 2007 11:18:14 AM | #

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Haha. "You may get TICKED off"...Lyme disease episode. Thats a great disclaimer to start your review!

Anony | Nov 16, 2007 9:38:07 AM | #

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Well, the show does kind of get recycled, but it never really gets old.
And its hilarious

Georgia | Nov 22, 2007 10:48:02 AM | #

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YA MANG

stephanie | Nov 22, 2007 10:51:33 AM | #

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people are stupid if they forget this is a tv show. this show is entertaining because in real life there is no one who can actually be like house and get away with it.

joits | Sep 26, 2008 3:01:23 AM | #

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