'Big Shots': Always test your parachute before jumping

This week's Big Shots picks up where we last saw our favorite Desperate Businessmen: Duncan's prostitute problem finally came back to bite him as Terrence, his nemesis, leaked the info to the press costing him his job; James had impulsively kissed Katie during an argument about her dating a married man; Karl continued on his path of the storyline I care least about; and Brody didn't have enough to do, if you ask me.

Spoilers below!

A lot happened so let's go over this quickly, character by character.

Duncan
None of the guys have heard from him in the few days after he got fired. That's because Duncan's been trying to buy shares of Reveal up so he can be on the Board and get his job back. Lizzie's already said she'd give him the shares she got in the divorce and now he's working on obtaining the rest that he needs from adrenaline junkie/billionaire Gavin Carter (the very in shape Richard Burgi - most recently seen on Desperate Housewives and in Hostel II, but he'll always be The Sentinel to me). When Duncan arrives at his house, Gavin greets him wearing nothing but a strategically placed rock-climbing rig (Hellooooo Nurse!). After a day full of crazy adrenaline filled shenanigans, the next morning Gavin takes Duncan sky-diving. Duncan admits he's never done it before and asks if they have a deal. Gavin, who likes him, says the shares are his if he jumps. So he does. Duncan lands safely and is jazzed. While chatting with a drive instructor about what an experienced pro Gavin was, they notice that he seemed to be falling a little too far. Then they realize that his parachute wasn't going open at all about 5 seconds before he crashes into the trees. Now, they never said specifically that he was dead and this is a soap opera, but I'm pretty sure he's not coming back from that. Back at the club, Duncan commiserates with the guys. When Lizzie and Terrence, whom Duncan's already had a run in with because he knows Terrance leaked the prostitute info to the media, the group tries to leave before they have to talk. But it's too late because Lizzie sees them and comes over to offer Duncan her condolences. Terrence then picks the wrong time to make a smart comment which results in him getting slugged by Duncan. Stalking out, Lizzie catches up to him and chastises him. It's at this moment Duncan tells Lizzie (or at least lead her to the conclusion) that Terrence was the one responsible for giving the story to the news. He then tells her, "Please don't marry him" several times in a quiet, increasingly desperate tone before leaving. Lizzie confronts Terrence about the next afternoon at lunch and tells him that they should postpone the wedding. Terrence asks for forgiveness, especially since she's forgiven Duncan so many times. She tells him that the difference is that Duncan never intentionally meant to hurt anyone where Terrence deliberately ruined his life. To make amends, Terrence tells her that he's been quietly buying up Reveal stock for years and that, between the two of them, there's enough shares to force the Board to rehire Duncan. He'll do this for Lizzie provided Duncan never finds out and that she'll still marry him. Later, as the guys set up to play pool at the club, Duncan gets a call telling him he's got his job back. Only he looks far more suspicious than he looks happy...

James
He tells the guys that he and Katie kissed and, when asked if it's going to be awkward, dismisses it as a moment of impulse. Plus she's dating Oliver the Married Douchebag. Except it is totally awkward and she broke up with Oliver, which sort of changes things for James. They agree to go to lunch and are having a stilted, inane conversation when Alex (whom James broke up with) shows up. She stops by to say hi and then James excuses himself to take a phone call from Stacey the Cheating Shrew Ex-Wife, leaving the two women alone. Alex makes note of their lack of witty banter and asks what happened between them, because something obviously happened. Katie denies that anything happened as she mentally flips Alex off. Alex then gives some "friendly" advice - James still isn't over Stacey and is clearly on the rebound - before taking her leave. I half expected Katie to throw knife at her. James comes back and says that Stacey the Shrew has something important to tell him. When he goes to meet her, she tells him that not only is she pregnant and that the baby is Nick the new boyfriend's, they're thinking of getting married. They're also thinking of moving to the West Coast for this job offer Nick got...and they're taking the kids with them. This does not make James happy. He tells her that "you're taking my kids to California over my dead body." Upon hearing about the crisis, Duncan gets James in touch with Lizzie's divorce lawyer who tells him that it's going to be a long arduous process that will most likely end in the favor of Stacey. He's distracted at work over the whole thing until Katie verbally slaps some sense into him. She tells him to stop being so mad at his cheating shrew of an ex-wife for a moment and really think about what's best for the kids. To that end, when James and Stacey and their respective lawyers meet, James' representation announces that the current custody arrangement won't need to be changed because James has submitted for a transfer to California. Sure, he'll lose his position but he busted his hump to get to the top once before and he can do it again. Stacey surprises James at his office later to tell him that she and Nick talked and they agreed that he'd fly back and forth to visit while she stayed in New York, sadly noting that he doesn't care as much about his child as James cares about his kids. Before leaving she says she thought his job was the most important thing to James, who responds by saying she never really knew him then. James goes to Katie afterward and thanks her for the verbal smack down, adding that Stacey still gets to him but Katie's the one who really knows him. Before he can say anything else, Katie interrupts him and says that she's back with Oliver the Married Douche who's supposedly left his wife. Either they're not really back together or Oliver is still with his wife.

Karl
No crappy wife/mistress storyline this week. Yay! Instead we're introduced to Eddie, a bully that tortured Karl all through high school and is now seeking membership at the club. Karl is not happy to see him but Brody says he's talked to Eddie and that he's a nice dude. Eddie later asks Karl to have dinner with him and they have a pleasant enough time. Eddie apologizes for his past behavior and then asks Karl to writer him a letter of recommendation as one is needed to join. Karl says no because he's already written his limit of two for the year. He shares how relieved he is not to have to deal with Eddie everyday with Brody...who actually wrote a recommendation for him. Brody apologizes but assures Karl that Eddie's reformed. Except he hasn't and predictably begins to harass Karl again now that he's a member. So much so that Karl ends up challenging him to a fight (he's begun boxing) despite trying to turn the other cheek. He asks Brody to help him train since Brody was a Golden Gloves boxer. The day of the fight, Brody is in Karl's corner as James and Duncan are on hand to lend moral support. It's not a pretty fight, but at least Karl gets some licks in before being knocked down. Brody rushes in to check on him as Eddie continues to run his jerky little mouth. Feed up, Brody settles things with a round-house kick to the head that knocks the jerk face out. Eddie, suffice it to say, ends up canceling his membership. This was an enjoyable reprieve from Karl's standard, tiresome storyline. More departures like this please!

Brody
He didn't get his own meaty story, as usual, but we didn't find out he's trained at fisticuffs. Interesting. Anyway, his hack plot-line involved finding old mushy love letters from a college boyfriend in wife Jenelle's closet that he didn't know about. Figuring she must have kept them because she thought he couldn't be romantic and creative, Brody sets out to write a super fantastic poem for her. He ends up stealing the lyrics from Bon Jovi's "You Give Love A Bad Name." Jenelle loved it as she's from Jersey and "Bon Jovi is like Shakespeare" to her.

Cameron & Zack
Cam's always been a little suspicious of her newly discovered brother but when he runs into a college friend at the party they throw in Duncan's apartment (while he's with Gavin Carter), she finds out from the college friend that they didn't meet at the school Duncan said he graduated from. Telling Lizzie her suspicions, Lizzie says to just ask him and see what he says. When Cam does, he says it was because he messed up his senior year and made a deal that he could finish his units anywhere and still get a Princeton degree. She's still a little suspicious of Zack so she takes it upon herself to get another paternity test done. While she's sneaking about gathering the necessary materials, she's acting a little tweaky so Zack ends up following her and sees her walking into the testing lab. Later, she gets the results and finds out that there's a 0% possibility that Duncan is Zack's father. She walks to her can and call him, saying she really needs to talk to him. When she gets into her car, she sees Zack approach and tries to start it but it won't turn over. We end the episode with Zack knocking on the window asking Cam to get out of the car...

I can't say that I'm surprised that Zack isn't actually Duncan's as I've been secretly holding on to my "Zack is Terrence's kid" theory. I hope that's the case because I enjoy being right.

Quotes of the Night:

• "Pasties and a g-string would be much more effective. Keeps the mystery alive." - James in response to Katie saying she'll be in a meeting naked to see if he's paying attention
• "I may be unemployed but you're the one engaged to the prince of darkness." - Duncan to Lizzie

What was your favorite part/quote of the episode? Is Cam going to have to kick Zack butt next episode in a daring escape? Oh, and Charisma Carpenter guests next week as an involved woman pushing up on Brody. Wait...is that...an actual story for him? It's a Christmas miracle!

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