Bionic Woman has so far suffered identity crisis after identity crisis, going through tonal shifts the way Lindsey Lohan goes through her mom's liquor cabinet. It's hard-core sci-fi! It's a wink-wink genre! It's a family drama! It's a feminist take on the modern woman! It's really freakin' terrible! It's kinda sorta OK! And after all these twists and turns, the show seems to have landed on its feet: as a retread of Alias.

Now, here's the thing: if it were actually just a retread of Alias, I'd actually be fine with that. The first two seasons of Alias are as perfect as television can get. But I've seen Alias. Alias was a friend of mine. And you, Bionic Woman, are no Alias. You're Alias with more than a dash of Chuck, two great shows that form the anti-Reese's Peanut Butter Cup of television. You see, Chuck is no Alias, but it's not really trying to be, either: it's a spy show in which the spy genre is incidental to the dramedy of the show. They don't need me to care about the individual case; they just need me to care about Chuck.

But you, Bionic Woman, you want me to care about these cases, you want me to treat the Berkut Group as an elite agency, you want me to treat this stuff with respect, but then you go and inject Chuck-esque banter because someone in NBC probably sent you a memo saying, "Lighten this show up already." So you took your own version of Alias' Marshall, ramped him up to twenty, and then gave everyone else wacky banter to be delivered during inappropriate times. I lost count after "six" of how many times Jaime and Tom stopped mid-mission in order to turn into rejects from Dawson's Creek. Thus do our new Sydney and Vaughn turn into Pacey and Joey.

As for our new Sloane: well, he's been reduced to babysitting Jaime's sister, so near as I can tell. Miguel Ferrer has this, "You're paying me in cash, right?" look in every scene. I honestly can't believe he signed up to play THIS character. He's gone from "I own your body, I paid for it" (super creepy, powerful, worthy of my attention) to "I won't tell you about your deliquent little brat of a sister lest it hurt your feelings." Are you kidding me? Now, had the show gone for a long-term arc in which Jonas softens over the months/years thanks to his interactions with Jaime, that would be one thing. This would lead to gradual character development and a chance for Jonas to truly step up at a crucial point in the narrative arc and define himself anew.

But "narrative arc" doesn't yet exist on Bionic Woman. They started out with a stab at mythology, with the Anthros family secrets and the original Bionic Woman giving Jaime a glimpse into what might come, but for now they've abandoned it in order to have Jaime fret and moan about Tom not calling her back for eight days. Don't get me wrong: I understand the dichotomy they are trying to achieve: the world's most powerful woman is also someone with everyday problems and insecurities. I get it, I really do. But I know more about Jaime's emotional issues with Tom than I do about her reasoning for joining the Berkut Group, and that's a tremendous problem.

To bring Alias back into this for another moment: Sydney Bristow had a compelling reason to stay with an organization she loathed: she wanted to take down Sloane, the man who killed her fiancé. Well, Jaime Sommers knows that the work done by her fiancé's company led directly to his death, and furthermore suspects that the same fiancé might have pegged her for bionic outfitting years before, and yet barely puts up a fight when pressed to work for the same organization. Furthermore, there's nothing in Jaime's character that establishes why she wants to trot across the globe catching bad guys. Sense of loss? Sense of morality? Great dental package from the Berkut Group? We just don't know. But we DO know that she likes warm towels after a soak. So, there's that, I suppose.

What's frustrating is that all these directions I'm implying aren't coming out of thin air: they are threads teased out from the shows that have aired. Maybe the writer's strike will make people forget these episodes ever aired, so they can start again from scratch. I'd spend the first third of the season with Jaime struggling with her new physical identity, struggling with the death of her fiancé, and struggling to stave off the recruitment of the Berkut Group. I would have used Sarah Corvis as a spy working for Anthros' father, trying to slowly seduce her to their side. The second third would be after Jaime grudgingly accepts the Berkut Group's offer after they save her life from Corvis and Anthros (introducing cases of the week, and the new love interest), and the latter third pitting the two sides fully against each other towards whatever Anthros' endgame is. I mean, not to pat myself on the back, but that's a better show than what we've seen so far, correct?

There's still time to save this show, but I'm worried that even if the writer's strike ends tomorrow, that Bionic Woman won't be able to fix itself in time.

What do make of the tonal shifts so far on this show? Does the introduction of Tom feel organic or simply a device? What advice would you give the showrunners?

For more TV reviews and analysis, check out Ryan at Boob Tube Dude.

Comments

I liked tonight's episode, it was much better than the first three.

Pam | Nov 7, 2007 8:56:07 PM | #

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I agree Tonight episode was okay but I agree with your storyline plot and I mean the show can still be campy fun because with that thier drawing away from Alias. Even though I wish it wasnt a "Fun" show.. "LOL Rejects from dawson Creek"

Tyson | Nov 7, 2007 10:27:07 PM | #

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i don't tune in to bionic woman for chuck...that's what chuck's for!!

i tune in to bionic woman for...SARA!! and, that does NOT bode well if they're not even gonna have her in some eps.

the best part of tonight's episode was li'l sis' stint in prison.

i'd watch YOUR season of bw! if kring can admit how messed up his show started this season and vow to do better...bw better use the time off to think up a clue before they write ANYthing else.

bottomlesswells | Nov 8, 2007 12:05:10 AM | #

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I really liked the character Will. I think that there could have been some interesting story line with him and Jamie against his father. Why did they have to kill him off? He is a great actor!

mildred | Nov 8, 2007 3:05:38 AM | #

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Nice that David Eick got a cylon a job for this episode. It would have been even sweeter had Starbuck aka Sarah Corvus been in this episode as well. (Especially since the cylon was none other than "Leoben" Callum Keith Rennie.)

Brian | Nov 8, 2007 5:43:22 AM | #

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I really liked this episode (and the previous one). This "version" of the new Bionic Woman is MUCH better than the first few episodes, where everything was dark and grim and depressing. I like having the lighter moments. Also, I gave up on "Alias" very early on, due to the non-stop complicated plots and seeming need to create a "self-contained world" in which the characters exist. This version of the Bionic Woman is just a hot chick beating up bad guys and having fun adventures. That works for me!

Zira | Nov 8, 2007 6:28:20 AM | #

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this show will definetly be canceled soon . The sooner the better

fr ances | Nov 8, 2007 6:46:59 AM | #

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this show will definetly be canceled soon . The sooner the better

frances | Nov 8, 2007 6:47:19 AM | #

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i just found myself sitting there at each commercial break last night saying, "my god this show is freaking bad"
this just isn't in any way what i signed up for when deciding to give this show an hour of my life each week. if i wanted to watch "the young and the restless", that's what i'd be watching. why the creative force behind this show decided it would be a good idea to make jamie so gullible and dim-witted is beyond me. and poor michelle ryan, where to start with her? i guess it's not completely her fault, but she is horrible with what little she's been given. and i agree with your write up completely, ryan. and your show idea sounds like it would be so much better than this trite, tired crap they keep keep shoving out each week. maybe this writers strike will be good after all. maybe i can find something better to do at 9 pm wednesday night!

newbionicsux | Nov 8, 2007 6:56:36 AM | #

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This is the most schizophrenic show I've ever seen and for now Im shelving it.

Tiki | Nov 8, 2007 7:34:25 AM | #

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I've no problems with this show. I've been enjoying it. The problem this columnist and others seem to have is they insist on comparing shows. Stop doing that. Bionic Woman is not Alias and Chuck is not Bionic Woman. Anyway, this show along with Chuck and most of the others will be cancelled anyway because of the strike, so for now I'm just enjoying them while they're on. Give me Bionic Woman over 24 any day.

Alex | Nov 8, 2007 7:56:48 AM | #

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Mildred, if you want to see Will alive you can find a preview of the pilot online where he didn't die, my husband found it over the summer and that is how I thought the show was going to go. I am guessing by all the other comments that most people don't know that they originally did not kill Will and you can imagine what happened when Jaime was able to confront him, much more interesting. In the pilot that wasn't aired they also made Jaime's sister deaf, which was interesting. Maybe since it has become such a soap Will could come back from the dead??? Anyway thought that everyone should know that they actually changed an amazing storyline before the show even aired in primetime.

Bren | Nov 8, 2007 8:02:38 AM | #

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I completely agree with you. I'm going to keep watching, but gosh this show frustrates me.

Mark | Nov 8, 2007 8:04:02 AM | #

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You've really nailed it. Haven't literally a dozen people come and gone as showrunners on this? We can almost SEE the "network notes" on the screen. I guarantee one of them was "make this dude like Marshall." Absolutely horrendous show -- the only way to salvage would be a nuclear reboot. Fire the entire cast, pretend "Berkut" never happened, make Katee Sackhoff the lead, decide on a Battlestar-like dark and hard tone. Otherwise, pull the plug on this turkey.

Thataboy | Nov 8, 2007 8:21:55 AM | #

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I can't say that I like this show I really tried very hard to like it, but my god Jamie Summer is bionic, and she doesn't kick butt, like Sydney did in Alias, I loved Alias, and you can't even compare this show to it. Michelle Ryan, doesn't have the sparkle that needs to brought to Jamie, I wished they would have pick Sara to just play the Bionic Woman, and I think this show would have been better. Also the writing is not there. You can't even compare the writing to Alias whatsoever, this show is not witty, smart and intelligent at all. I am tuning out.

Nancy | Nov 8, 2007 8:26:36 AM | #

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I agree the show has problems, the premiere was pretty good, but what happened to Jonas and his "heads you lose, tails you die" attitude of the original. Ever since its like he is Dr. Phil. I agree with Nancy, Jamie is bionic but can't fight; episode one she was programmed with fight training, but now takes forever fighting one guy. The old Lindsay Wagner, Jamie would take a guy and throw against a wall and he is out. Heck, Syd from Alias could take out guys faster.

jbw | Nov 8, 2007 8:57:40 AM | #

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Seriously people, most of the viewers stopped watching the first couple of epidodes. I gave it three and it still wasn't improving, it was getting worse. I was holding out hope it would be the next 'Alias' but it never made it. The biggest problem is the writing, and the then the acting. Michelle Ryan is no Jennifer Garner.

nfw | Nov 8, 2007 9:24:51 AM | #

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I thought the reason he hid the secret of little sister's trouble was so Jamie wouldn't freak out and quit over leaving sis alone so much.

Michelle | Nov 8, 2007 10:00:30 AM | #

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I guess this is what happens to a good concept when you change producers/writing teams 4 or 5 times already. Each individual concept is fine, just not when connected to the previous/next one that it replaces/replaced.

Rishi | Nov 8, 2007 10:03:54 AM | #

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Ryan can you write a few eps? I just had the show on as background noise while I did other things. Last weeks episode didn't work for me. While what I saw did look good. I just don't think the show is ever going to hit the mark. Alias style or otherwise

Albert | Nov 8, 2007 10:28:38 AM | #

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I say this show will be cancelled by the end of the year.

richard burton | Nov 8, 2007 11:42:36 AM | #

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Im alittle confused. Is this a site for people who like the show or hate it?

I have never seen Alias so I dont understand the comparison but my thought is why compare, just take the show as it is presented. If you like it, great. If not then DON'T watch.

darrpub | Nov 8, 2007 12:02:33 PM | #

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For darrpub's elucidation...this is a blog for a show that some people like, about as many despise, and a larger, third group are in between. I was a member of the third group until last night's episode. Maybe I got a little jaded by Kim Bauer, but anytime an obnoxious little worm of either gender begins to steal screen time away from the main point of the show, I leave. I actually loved the old sitcom Family Matters when it first started out, but then along came Urkel, and it not only jumped the shark, it revved back around and jumped it a few dozen more times for good measure. Bionic Woman is suffering from the same annoying trait as other shows in which teenagers of either gender are featured semi-prominently...they are, almost without exception, so ridiculously pathetic that the show gets dragged down in a surly morass of angst. Becca as a character is really not as bad as others, but it is because her sister's job is so (supposedly) important that the writers need to find something else for her to do besides cause Jamie yet more stereotypical drama. I've known quite a few teenagers (more girls than boys just because their families that are my family's friends just popped them out that way), and with only a few exceptions, all of them are decent kids, and for those who are now adults, good folks as well. I have been watching TV since 1972, when I was three, and I've seen a lot of changes in programming since then. One thing that hasn't changed, though, is the medium's inability to create more than an archetype when it comes to teens. What we see on television nowadays is what executives, producers and writers WANT to think teenagers are like, either because they had such crappy adolescent lives themselves, or because they've gone truly senile. In any case, if Becca is going to remain a character on this version of Bionic Woman, she needs to grow up, get an attitude adjustment and move beyond her own little insignificant world. Either that, or get rid of her outright. The show's on a downward spiral as it is, and keeping useless annoyances around just adds on the anchors. As for me, I've about had enough. Maybe another week or so, just to see if things get better, but after that, I'll go watch Criminal Minds (especially now that Mandy-Pandy Patty-Cake-Tankin is gone).

Dark Disciple | Nov 8, 2007 12:25:15 PM | #

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I don't think this show mimicked 'Alias' at all. 'Alias' was sci-fi/espionage soap opera with a heavy dose of Rambaldi myth, which was loosely based on the prophecies of Nostradamus.

The show did take a lighter and campier tone though. The last two episodes are very "Mr. & Mrs. Smith" when her new CIA sidekick/love interest entered the picture.

Alias Junkie | Nov 8, 2007 1:08:22 PM | #

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Let's not forget how bad the first season of X-Files was. I'll never forget that terrible "haunted space shuttle" episode! But then that show blossomed into some of the best television ever. (and then it sucked again for the last few seasons).
Anyway don't give up on the Bionic Woman. It may yet turn into must see t.v.

x-buffyFan | Nov 8, 2007 1:25:11 PM | #

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darrpub, you're missing the point. We were all hoping like hell that BW would be the new "Alias", since the bright lights at ABC saw fit to cancel the latter.

"Alias" was on fire from the first scene of "Truth Be Told". BW is 6 eppies old and there's no sign of smoke, let alone fire. It's a huge disappointment, and while modest headway is being made since the 2nd eppie, that abomination known as "Paradise Lost", the sorry truth is that "Chuck" has more "Alias" buzz to it than BW.

Who the hell woulda thunk?

Page 48 | Nov 8, 2007 1:55:50 PM | #

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Seriously, a spies' list?? again?? They use this plot on every spy caper, Mission Impossible, Charlie's Angels... If that list is so easy to get then why not try another idea instead of adding even more names on the thing to get stolen and why are the spies sent to retrieve the list never on it? Where do their names go?
As for Sloane babysitting the bratty sister - they spent 50 mill on Jaimie's legs so now have no cash left over for a babysitter? What happened to Jaimie's friends? None of them can help out? I wouldn't expect my boss to babysit for me. That girl should have a part time job anyway - I still can't get over the ep where she paid $170 for a pair of jeans that makes a scrawny 15 year old's but look good - she's 15. Good idea to teach her she can have whatever she wants when she wants it!
Back to the inept twosome - who couldn't see that that guy was about to lock them in a closet? I ask you isn't that spy 101?

Sirius | Nov 8, 2007 2:39:14 PM | #

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Not that I am overlooking the huge problems in continuity and tone that have been brought up in this column and in the previous comments, because they are major problems, but I wonder if something else isn't behind some of the writing problems themselves.

TV series launching is something of a Catch-22 these days since networks (and audiences!) give little or no time to shows to develop- pilots become like "mini-movies" in that they are meant to attract people and be powerhouse hits from the start. However, such expectations are almost anathema to the most common complaints about this show. I agree completely with Ryan's idea that the show should have allowed Season 1 to develop much more naturally and organically, but they basically would have had to write a show that would not have "grabbed" the limited attention spans of many TV watchers nowadays, hence it would have had to build slowly in ratings, rather than start "with a bang."

Is it fair to say that with this situation in place, it would be nearly impossible for most shows to get off the ground and build a successful following? I believe so, at least with regard to dramatic series with ongoing plotlines, like Bionic Woman. The reason shows like CSI and Law and Order are so popular is that each episode is self-contained; there is very little in terms of character development over time, so one does not feel the need to watch every episode to follow the story arc, because there really isn't one. The "crime of the week" device is what grabs people and makes a series like those successful from the start. Shows like BW are destined not to do well unless they come up with some magic formula like Lost did in its first season. And let's face it, if every show were a unique concept show, concepts would run out pretty quickly and things would be boring again. I guess there's no solution to this dilemma on network TV?

Kevin | Nov 8, 2007 3:19:38 PM | #

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totally agree Ryan! I think they should scrap BW and then bring back Alias the fabulousness that that show was and have the SpyFamily reunited and kicking ass for another five years...as long as JJ comes back to head it and if ABC doesn't get any creative say!

lindsay | Nov 8, 2007 9:52:02 PM | #

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This is the best articulation of a "what went wrong with a potentially promising show" critique I've every read on this site. You nailed it. My daughter likes this show though so I gave it another shot this week. By mid-way through the episode I was on YouTube introducing her to the original Bionic Woman. Cheesy? Yes. Even my 13 year old daughter thought the 70's era show was cheesy. Most shows of that era were in retrospect. But at the time, I was a 13 year old boy glued to my set every Wednesday night (yes, it aired on the same night but on ABC) at 8 pm. The main character had a story arc of finding out who she was after losing her memory, coming to terms with her bionics and trying to find love. At least the tone of the show was consistent throughout. They knew what they were trying to do and did it well every week. The show and Wagner even won an emmy. Does this show have that potential. Right now, it may not even have the potential to last the rest of the year, strike or no strike.

BGT | Nov 9, 2007 7:02:11 AM | #

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This show is losing me, but every time I vow to tell them to eff off, they go and do something like bring in Callum Keith Rennie. A freakin' Cylon! How beautiful was that? They are so shamelessly playing on my Battlestar Galactica luv. It's not fair!

Plus, the CIA dude is super cute . . .

Siansonea | Nov 9, 2007 8:42:14 AM | #

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I totally agree with the above blog of Jaime being compared to Syndney. After I watched the show I said the same thing...Like I remember when Syndey lost her fiance, or better still when she had to fight Francie, now that was cool. But through it all Syd still had an emotional brak-down, Jaime has yet to have one, SHE LOST A BABY HELLO...... Come on now, get our girl jaime back in touch with reality, let her grieve, then, yes then, and I say again, yes then, let her whoop some ass...If not for loosing her bf, then for loosing her unborn child....they should have even made it more chilling by saying that it can't be determined yet if you can have kids, it will take at least a year before we will know, now if that's not motivation, to find out why the hell your life has indeed turned into a stone throws away from hell, then, I don't know, becuase if I were the new jaime sommers and I had been through what she had been through, I would have somehow increased the dosage on the morhpine drip for at least 20 min of the first episode, tried to deal with the pain with lots and lots of tears, left, somehow, that horrible place that so called fixed me, laid in bed for two weeks, well except for taking my kid sister to school or whatever, met someone wise and ass kicking that would help me realize what I need to do in the most inspiratiional way as far as revelations go, that maybe i can do this and find out why this happened to me the way syndey did, then and i say again, start kicking ass against the Annas (rembeber sydney and Annas first fight)the laurens the sarahs and Francies and Irena dervekos that, oh and sloans that tried to kill me in the first place. Now I hope some NBC writer is reading these comments, cause lets face it even Lindsy Wagner's character hit rock bottom before she came back as the "bomb" bionic woman, heck she even died, came back barely remembering who she was, lost the love of her life then tried to live, come on you guys you owe the Jaime charachter a little more respect than what she is going through now.

Bottom line, though I like the new jaime...she needs to break down....down...and....down.... down some more....then get up....up...and...up....and...up to find out what the end-game to her life is.

I said on another blog give the british girl a chance, well, writers now u have to show and prove, help the girl out.

PS rembember how Syndey could barely beat Lauren the girl who married Vaughn, or how the first Bionic Woman almost died fighting the fembots.

Erick | Nov 9, 2007 2:17:20 PM | #

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I agree with your Ryan McGee, your plot idea's sound interesting. I would give the showrunners the advice you have given.

As for this episode tbh i thought it was awful. A shame really because it started of really good, with the meeting between the bad guy and the Berkut group. Then it went downhill from there.

I think it's great Jaime has a love life, but when it get's in the way of her missions, then it becomes silly. Why did the two stop to kiss for a second time when they were chasing the bad guy? Their on a mission to get a list to save their fellow agents for crying out loud!

As for Becca - either get rid of her or introduce some plot lines where her character has a reason for being on the show. As it is Jaime takes so little responsibility for her and it's obvious that the writers don't know what to do with Becca anymore.

For me this show is all over the place. The various shifts in tones haven't helped. A shift in tone should feel organic and not forced. As it is BW doesn't really know what it wants to be. All the behind the scenes changes haven't helped either.

Neena | Nov 10, 2007 12:00:24 AM | #

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