Side Order of Life gives our three main women potentially happy endings this week -- which can't be good, because it's not the end. Jenny thinks she's found Cell Phone Man, Vivy thinks she's found a man to love her despite her illness, and Becca thinks she's finally landed Ian. I can't help but think things aren't going to stay happy for long.

It's time again for the most inappropriate show on television, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. And while last week's two-parter pulled up lame in the second half, I'm happy to say both episodes of week two were hilariously wrong. Continue reading »

Burn Notice! Two-hour season finale! Now! On USA! (Yeah, I'm a little pumped. Wanna fight about it?)

One knows that they are in for a good time watching Kitchen Nightmares because it starts off with a “Viewer Discretion is Advised” warning. It’s a cooking show, and it starts with a warning about the language. Fantastic.

Last Comic Standing had its two-hour finale Wednesday night, and my goodness do I love my DVR.

Ahoy, mateys! I’m Liz, and I’ll be your Top Model cruise director! (Um, spoiler alert!) I’m going to kick things off with the disclaimer that if you’re watching this show and think that you want to look like any of the contestants, you should probably go into the kitchen right now and eat a big bar of chocolate. For reals.

You know Rocky IV, where Rocky went up against Ivan Drago, and Drago had this state-of-the-art gym and trainers and illicit substances and whatnot, while Rocky chopped wood and pulled rocks through the snow and stuff like that? The Biggest Loser was just like that. Just substitute "Red and Blue Teams" for Drago, "the Black Team" for Rocky, "Jillian" for Duke and Paulie (and yes, Jillian does have the bad-assedness to stand in for two people) and ...

Damages gave us one admittedly jaw-dropping revelation Tuesday night -- we now know who Boone (or Assemblyman Zellman, if you like) is, and it's a nice twist. But the bulk of the episode was about smaller things.

"The road is long
With many a winding turn
That leads us to who knows where
Who knows where
But I'm strong
Strong enough to carry him
He ain't heavy, he's my... father"

In Eureka, if it isn't one thing, it's another. (In this case "one thing" refers to a breakdown of Eureka's underground cooling system, and "another" refers to Mild-Mannered Sheriff Jack Carter being transformed into Irresistible Man-Meat Jack Carter.)

We finally find out Grace's big bad secret on Saving Grace, and it's ugly. We also find out that it takes approximately 11 years for anything to get through Grace's thick skull -- like, perhaps bringing strange men home and giving them access to handcuffs is not the best plan. Just a thought.

This week's episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm starts off with Larry, Cheryl, Jeff and the Blacks unpacking boxes as they move into a different house following last week's fire.

You know all the stuff that didn't happen in the rest of the season of Dead Zone, stuff about conspiracies and apocalypses and bad men and secrets and all the rest? They saved it all up for this episode. They jam so much in here that I can hardly keep track of it all. But in the end, it looks like we're right back at the beginning, like this season never happened.

It's been a long and hard road for the Rock of Love fans, but we are near the end. In fact, there's only 3 girls left. Although, I think perhaps two of them should have been hospitalized for blood alcohol poisoning after the Vegas trip we witnessed last week.

The summer is coming to a close, and so is Big Brother. There are only 2 people left in the house and we've seen a lot of backstabbing, emotional breakdowns, hate speech and verbal abuse, and if that's not entertainment, I don't know what is.

I have no proof of this, of course, but I'm pretty sure at some point between delivering the pilot episode and cutting the second episode, the creative staff of Tell Me You Love Me received the following memo ...

What do a graffiti-spraying punk, tattooed guys wearing capes and a petulant princess have in common? Why, Flash Gordon of course!

There are a lot of things worth talking about from Thursday's Mad Men, but one thought kept running through my head as I watched it: Man, what $45,000 must have looked like in 1960.

Finally, after what seems like months of waiting for the U.S. Open to end, Burn Notice is back, baby! And don't get me wrong--I love tennis. But I'm pretty sure Bruce Campbell hasn't swung a racket at Flushing Meadows anytime recently, so it's just innately less awesome than Burn Notice. I mean, come on. Bruce Freaking Campbell! (Yeah, the first season is coming to an end and I'm still not over the awesomeness.)

It's been a long and traumatic season for Big Brother fans, yet here we are in the final throes of the grand psychodrama. There are only 3 HGs left in the house, but I feel certain we can manage at least a little more backstabbing. Please? Well, we aren't going to find out here in the opener, so let's get to the goods! We start as we always start, with a whole lot of previouslys.

So, it's my job and everything to report on the happenings on Wednesday's final Last Comic Standing performance show. But it's awfully hard to be excited about it.

Yes! There has been a mystery solved on Damages! Have you been wondering why Ellen will be wearing underwear under a trench coat when she finds David dead? Did it keep you awake at night? You can sleep soundly now, my friend; the explanation is that her clothes get stained with blood from the fight in Patty's apartment, so she takes them off. Thanks, Damages! So that's one down, what, forty-seven to go?

Welcome to another season of The Biggest Loser, where the routine contempt America has for fat people is combined with the ritual humiliation aspect of the reality show. Now that's empowerment!

It’s been a long haul on Big Brother 8, but we’re nearly down to the end.  Someone has finally flexed enough to put Dick and Daniele on the block, but is it too little, too late?  Must we really be subjected to the spectacle of those two competing for the win?  Is there no relief in sight?

At the risk of angering the many rightfully loyal Eureka fans who frequent this website, I'm gonna go ahead and say that this episode wasn't one of Eureka's finest moments.

Man, tonight's season finale certainly was action-packed! And as usual, we learned a valuable lesson from the good folks at Greek, this time about how lying is bad and prone to backfiring. Mostly. Except when it's kind of not. Thanks, Greek!

Apparently Haim will not be returning for this, the last episode of the season (as you may remember he flew out of town in the previous episode). So, that leaves Feldman and Susie here to remind us about all the wonder and magic in this season of The Two Coreys. Is there anything better than going out in your season finale with a clip show? I think not.

You can't say nothing happened on The 4400 this week. With only a week to go before the season finale, there was enough action in this episode to get everyone who cares about the fate of the promicin-enhanced world keyed up for next week. Deaths! Shootings! Arguments! Kidnapping! Nanotechnology! And injections! Lots and lots of injections!

It's the second to last episode of Dead Zone, and we finally get around to addressing what was ostensibly supposed to be the central mystery again: Why did Walt Bannerman die?

What has always impressed me about Curb Your Enthusiasm is that Larry David makes it very obvious within the first few minutes of the episode exactly where the story is going to go, but it is still always funny watching it get there.

Oh, Rock of Love fans ... it feels like such a farce to go through the previouslys each week, as if something unexpected occurred. As if perhaps the girls put away the cans of Coors and opted instead for nice orange pekoe with a splash of milk. Instead of dry humping the stripper pole in the main room, they decided to change it up and discuss Sartre's defense of Existentialism. Alas, constant readers, no.

The season finale of State of Mind had surprise pregnancy, lost children, heartfelt conversations, confessions, love lost, love found, and a rousing dance number at the end (sort of). And as far as I can tell, I was the only person in the Zap2It universe watching it.

Side Order of Life is so crazy-making sometimes. It's got good characters, a reasonably compelling set-up, decent dialog... and then it throws in something so completely unbelievable that it makes me want to scream.

Our last episode had a double eviction that kept the show fast paced, engaging and while not surprising, at least it got us through the foregone conclusions with as little pain as possible. Which means that going back to the standard Big Brother show format this evening will be disagreeable to say the least.

Yes, folks, here we go with the first of ten episodes of HBO's new drama, Tell Me You Love Me, better know in casual circles as That Show That Shows All the Sex Stuff. You couldn't escape any review of this series without some holier-than-thou critic bemoaning the full frontal nudity, or some hipper-than-thou critic bemoaning the bemoaners. All this over a bunch of moaners. Honestly.

After taking a week off for Labor Day, Flash Gordon returns, still only playing the remade Queen theme in 30-second intervals under next week's previews. I demand a full, voice over-less playing of the song! But I digress.

The hints we'd previously been given about Don Draper's past on Mad Men could have pointed to him hiding something a little sinister behind his new name. After watching Thursday's episode, though, can you blame the guy?

Tonight promises to be a busy one in the Big Brother house, and not just because Daniele has a lot of whining to do, Dick has a lot of verbal abuse to accomplish, Eric and Jessica have kissing to catch up on, Jameka has praying to get out of the way and Zach has ... well, whatever. Tonight is also a double eviction night!

It's been two weeks since the last Top Chef: Miami, but the loss of Tre still leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. Let's see if the judges did better this time around.

A modest proposal to the producers of Last Comic Standing: How about, once you get down to the final three performers, you give them more than 12 minutes total to perform?

And so Crying Amber has left our lives, leaving a tiny hole in the household and a vast gulf in the repertoire of easy jokes to make about Big Brother 8. With Zach finally acting as the wild card and Jessica nominated for eviction, things finally promise to break wide open on the way to the endgame.

Ah, invisibility. Such an apt metaphor for a wide variety of situations. On the one hand, we've got a literal invisibility crisis. On the other hand, we've got the classic "nerdy loner turns from invisible to desirable when cute girl is forced to interact with him" situation. On the other, other hand, we've got the magically appearing new cast member, who was but an invisible Eureka resident to us until she became a love interest.

Tonight on Greek, passive-aggressive behavior was at an all-time high. And, for the record, it didn't pay off. So I wouldn't bother with that note you're about to leave for your messy roommate -- it'll probably just turn into an escalating prank war, or backfire and make everything think you're a jerk.

Monday (Sept. 3) night's Weeds was dedicated to Nancy Botwin getting her first seemingly legitimate job (appropriate for Labor Day, I guess) and meeting her new employer, who may not be so legitimate himself.

Well, I got my wish that someone would get hurt on this midseason finale of Kyle XY. I just thought that Madacorp would be more directly responsible.

Welcome to the Church of Class! Oh wait, this is Rock of Love. Welcome to the Church of Trash!