"The road is long
With many a winding turn
That leads us to who knows where
Who knows where
But I'm strong
Strong enough to carry him
He ain't heavy, he's my... father"

The summer is coming to a close, and so is Big Brother. There are only 2 people left in the house and we've seen a lot of backstabbing, emotional breakdowns, hate speech and verbal abuse, and if that's not entertainment, I don't know what is.

It's been a long and traumatic season for Big Brother fans, yet here we are in the final throes of the grand psychodrama. There are only 3 HGs left in the house, but I feel certain we can manage at least a little more backstabbing. Please? Well, we aren't going to find out here in the opener, so let's get to the goods! We start as we always start, with a whole lot of previouslys.

It’s been a long haul on Big Brother 8, but we’re nearly down to the end.  Someone has finally flexed enough to put Dick and Daniele on the block, but is it too little, too late?  Must we really be subjected to the spectacle of those two competing for the win?  Is there no relief in sight?

Our last episode had a double eviction that kept the show fast paced, engaging and while not surprising, at least it got us through the foregone conclusions with as little pain as possible. Which means that going back to the standard Big Brother show format this evening will be disagreeable to say the least.

Tonight promises to be a busy one in the Big Brother house, and not just because Daniele has a lot of whining to do, Dick has a lot of verbal abuse to accomplish, Eric and Jessica have kissing to catch up on, Jameka has praying to get out of the way and Zach has ... well, whatever. Tonight is also a double eviction night!

And so Crying Amber has left our lives, leaving a tiny hole in the household and a vast gulf in the repertoire of easy jokes to make about Big Brother 8. With Zach finally acting as the wild card and Jessica nominated for eviction, things finally promise to break wide open on the way to the endgame.

It's Sunday, and that means that it's time for another Big Brother episode! We start with our previouslys, showing Jessica nominating Zach and Amber, while Dick and Daniele doubt her loyalty to their alliance. For no apparent reason. But, in quid quo pro, Jessica and Eric are wondering about Dick and Daniele too.

Happy Thursday, Big Brother fans! I can hardly wait to see who gets the boot this week! Jessica is HoH, which made everyone quite jovial, until it came time to nominate people for eviction. Now it's down to either Zach (the ogre) or Amber (the hate-monger), because Eric won the PoV last Tuesday and decided not to use it. Which went over GREAT! And by "great", I mean not!

It's time for your Tuesday dose of Big Brother, one of the nights where the contests mean something! Previously on Big Brother: Eric stalls with Jessica (still); Dick and Daniele bicker (more); Jameka and Zach try to sink Dick and Daniele (as usual); America's Player manages to swing the vote (again), and persuades his way into getting Amber nominated for eviction alongside Zach.

Welcome to Sunday's Big Brother!  The house is getting smaller, the alliances are getting trickier, and the back stabbing is becoming more frequent.

We started the week with Jameka and Amber on the block. Amber received visions from God that she would win the PoV, but she lost and she cried. Daniele took the PoV instead, but used it to save Amber and I cried. So tonight, it's down to Jen or Jameka. Who's going to leave the Big Brother house? Will Amber cry? Will the squirrels finally leave their nest in Julie Chen's hair? Let's find out!

Deals have been made with the devil (a.k.a. Evil Dick), Dustin got the boot, and Jameka and Amber are out in the cold. Jen is trying to stay off the radar, Eric and Jessica may be flirting a little too much and no one knows who Zach is. The Big Brother house is getting stranger, folks! Let's watch it devolve further.

Dustin gets the axe? Eric turns coat and allies with Evil Dick? It’s been another shocking week on Big Brother 8, and we come roaring into an all-talking, not-much-happening Sunday to try digesting it all. 

The Big Brother 8 house is divided, the LNC is dead, Nerd Herd (the second coming) is kicking,  and Jessica is the HoH! She nominated Dick and Daniele for eviction and Dick made it his purpose in life to make everyone hate him to take the heat of hid daughter. Which was unnecessary in the end, because he won the PoV and took her off the block himself. Dustin had volunteered to go up and Jessica took him up on it. Who will be evicted? Let's find out!

It's Tuesday and things are still heating up in the Big Brother 8 house. We start this show as we start all shows: with more previouslys than we need. The LNC split in two when Dustin, Amber, Jameka and Jessica vote to keep Eric, leaving only Dick, Daniele and Zach voting for his departure ... which was quite a shock to them. Jessica won the HoH and put Dick and Daniele on the block. Let's see how long it takes before Dick's head explodes!

Yikes!  I go away for one week and Big Brother 8 gets so angry!  People yelling everywhere, Eric getting nominated for eviction, and Kail finally getting the boot?  I can’t leave these people alone for a second.

It's getting and heated and hateful in the Big Brother house, so let's just jump into the funk tub, shall we? We start with a load of previouslys about how Dick and Daniele have suddenly come up with a theory that Eric voted to keep Kail last week while simultaneously believing he is the one who masterminded Nick's eviction, also last week. How those things are not mutually exclusive, I don't know.

So, it seems Sunday had some tumultuous moments as covered by our own Big Brother 8 pinch hitter, Andy. Just in case you missed it, Daniele won HoH after swearing to Kail that she would not evict her - and then immediately put her on the block with Jen. Additionally, someone with wealth and too much free time on their hands hired a plane to fly overhead with a banner, screaming love for Nick, pegging Eric and Amber as liars and dissing the LNC as the "nerd herd".  What will that mean for this week's PoV?

If it's Sunday, that means time for another Big Brother 8, though I bet you're used to Mike or, in a pinch, Jessi recapping the episode. Well, I've watched the early ends of Drive and Pirate Master, so let's see how I do on a cancel-proof show. Thanks to Mike and Jessi for letting me fill in tonight and risk both their livelihoods.

It's Thursday and someone is getting the boot on Big Brother 8!  Who will be evicted? Daniele's "showmance", Nick or town-owner, Kail? How long until Amber sobs again? Does everyone hate Dustin after his prize grabbing on Tuesday? Have the squirrels moved out of Julie Chen's hair? Dear God, let's begin!

We start with our Big Brother 8 previouslys, as always, to assuage any fears you may have had that you missed something. Nick got kissyface, Dustin became HoH, Amber cried, Dick tried to talk to Daniele, Daniele took a ride in the waaaahmbulance, and in the end Dustin put up Jen and Kail on the elimination block. All caught up!

With another one of the outsiders taking control as Head of Household, and another one of the blander members of the household pushed out into the cold, it seems like Big Brother 8 is really starting to show off the big personalities.

It's time for Big Brother 8, where we will find out who will be eliminated, who will win HoH, and how bad can RoboChen's hair possibly get?  We start with the previouslys: Kail lied a lot, betrayed her "best friend" Jen, and ended up on the block with her. Jen won the PoV and used it to save herself while Mike was nominated in her stead after annoying Dick during the PoV competition.

Haiku!
It's Tuesday again
And time for Big Brother 8
My shame runs so deep

What a difference a few days make! From wearing the largest target on his back last Sunday, Dick has soared to rule the Big Brother household this week. After the whimpering exit of both Carol and Joe, Dick has a chance to make the Outsider Housemate gimmick actually work for Big Brother 8. Can he turn the house upside down? How many housemates can he yell at in the course of one hour? Will Daniele ever have a non-tactical conversation with him?

Has it really been 2 days since we last peeked in on Dysfunction Junction? Indeed it has, so lets dive right into our Big Brother previouslys! Jen is dreadful, Joe and Dick are up for eviction, Nick likes Daniele and told her about the alliance, and Amber's tear ducts are sore. That's all you really need to know.

We start this weeks Big Brother with a set of previouslys that I had hoped would reveal that Sunday was all a bad hallucination. Sadly no, Jen really is the HoH. And in the most evil nomination ceremony I can imagine, she has put Dick and Daniele on the eviction block.

Well, with the first housemate out on her privileged tush and a truly jaw-dropping new Head of Household installed, things are finally startin' to pick up around here in Big Brother land.  Can this Sunday's episode keep up the momentum?  There's only one way to find out!

Even though I have barely recovered from Tuesday's exciting episode, CBS is already tossing another hour of non-stop thrills and chills at me. And by thrills and chills I really mean soul crushingly vapid conversation and meaningless gossip. And that's entertainment!

Is it time for Big Brother already? Of course! It's been two whole days since our last view of the house on network television. How can you handle the suspense? We open with a recap, which somehow fails to mention Joe screaming "he gave me GONORRHEA!", and therefore it falls short. Miserably.

Sunday nights aren't traditionally the most exciting for Big Brother, I'll grant you. But here at the start of the series, it's our chance to really get to know the players, understand their motivations, and set the stage for the inevitable, delicious, three-month bloodbath to follow.

Another season of Big Brother started this evening. What could they possibly do to keep the show fresh and interesting for the eighth go-round? How about make people live with individuals they never wanted to see again? And how about a house guest whose actions can be manipulated by audience votes? Their big question is: Will the audience be kind or cruel? My big question is: Do they really have to ask? And also, why is Julie Chen's hair stuck in 1987?