Cartier's 'Celebrity Apprentice' ad: What was that?

Luxury jeweler Cartier is, it would seem, completely misinformed about who is watching NBC's "The Celebrity Apprentice." Or that's the only explanation we can think of for the 3:31 minute "L'Odyssee de Cartier" commercial that debuted during Sunday's (March 4) episode.

Let us be the first to assure Cartier -- and all high-end jewelers -- that people with the means to purchase jewels worthy of futuristic czars who live on a post-apocalyptic ice-age planet where gold CGI dragons chase panthers who are apparently in love with supermodel Shalom Harlow are not watching raunch queen Lisa Lampanelli and "Real Housewives of New Jersey's" Teresa Guidice jump through hoops for Donald Trump.

Though we're pretty sure that Teresa would totally buy a jewel-encrusted panther bracelet after watching the, umm, masterpiece. According to a press release, the ad is Cartier's first ever "film" and it was meant to embody the company's history.

"The filming took place over the three months with a crew of 60 people on location," reads the release.

We kid you not.