'Amazing Race: Unfinished Business' premiere: Swimming with sharks

"The Amazing Race" is doing its second all-star edition with "Unfinished Business," which features all pairs who might have done better had there not been a mistake or some careless on their part.

The 11 teams kick things off at Palm Springs. Phil tells the teams that whichever team wins the first leg of the race will get the Express Pass, which will let them out of any task at any point along the race. The first task is to search a field of paper airplanes and bring Phil "Queensland and Northern Territories Aerial Services," or "Qantas." The first eight teams are on the first flight, the last three are on a later flight, plus the last team gets an automatic U-turn for the first Detour.

The teams have some trouble with acronyms, which kind of amazes us. Eventually Mel/Mike, Zev/Justin, Cord/Jet get their clue for Sydney, Australia. Lagging behind are Kent/Vyxsin, Christina/Ron, Flight Time/Big Easy, Margie/Luke, Cara/Jaime. Those are the eight teams on the first flight.

Kisha/Jen, Gary/Mallory, Amanda/Kris are on the last flight and and it takes Gary/Mal, A/K for-freakin'-ever to figure it out. A/K end up last. Man, I do not agree with that automatic penalty. Let other teams impose U-turns, don't just force one on a team right out of the gate. They are at such a disadvantage right away.

But the first flight must stop in Hawaii -- because of a medical emergency? I'm sorry, my TV sound cut out for a minute, but Big Easy was saying they hoped someone was OK, so we hope that someone was OK too.

So now the second flight is ahead of the first, which is huge. Love it. I didn't watch Mallory/Gary's season, so this is my first exposure to them, but she is cute as a bug in a rug. I bet that gets annoying, though.

Roadblock

"Who's ready to get tanked?" *raises hand*

At Ocean World, a team member must find a compass in a giant tank full of sharks and a stingray, then use the compass to decipher a sentence written in nautical flags that points them to the next task. Wow, that is a hard core task. They are not screwing around with these people who have raced before.

Mallory, Amanda and Kisha do the Roadblock for the first three teams. Meanwhile, it looks like the Cowboys are in last as they just missed the ferry to Ocean World. Margie, Flight Time, Vyxsin, Justin, Cara, Mel and Christina do the Roadblock for the next eight teams.

One of the Cowboys "hilariously" says he doesn't do water because he's from Oklahoma - he doesn't even take baths. Um, you aren't even swimming. You're walking in a tank. It has nothing to do with Oklahoma and/or your bathing habits.

Mallory/Gary finish first and must now sail a 16 ft skiff across Manly Bay along a water course that has clues on the buoys, which the teams must lean off the boat and grab, they cannot swim to the clues.

It is now Pit Stop time. Gary/Mallory and Amanda/Kris are in a race to the Pit Stop, which A/K really need to win so they can use the Express Pass to negate the penalty. G/M are there first and get the Express Pass, A/K are next, then Kisha/Jen.

Jaime/Cara and Margie/Luke get their phrase from the flags wrong, which is "I'm between the devil and the deep blue sea." They say "I'm the devil and the deep blue sea," which ... have you never heard that phrase before? Couldn't you make an educated guess? Hmph.

Zev/Justin help the Globetrotters, but not Margie/Luke or Cara/Jaime. I'm not really on board with helping people, but to each their own. On the boat, the Globetrotters have a little trouble and "Sweet Georgia Brown" makes its first appearance, so everybody drink!

Ron/Christina and Mel/Mike let Cara/Jaime and Margie/Luke come along with them and overhear the answer. Oh, that is crap. Make them figure it out! Margie and Luke then tell Kent/Vyxsin. Uh, this was not a hard puzzle. You had the key to the cryptogram! Stop telling people the answer! It's not like they gave them one flag = "e" and made them figure it out from there.

Sorry, I know that sounds heartless. But it annoys me. This is not "The Amazing Friendship," this is the "Amazing Race."

At the Pit Stop, the next seven teams go Zev/Justin, Globetrotters, Jaime/Cara, Margie/Luke, Ron/Christina, Mel/Mike and Kent/Vyxsin. The Cowboys are still solving the world puzzle. Maybe they don't have puzzles and/or words in Oklahoma.

When Kent/Vyxsin finish, Phil tells them they are the 10th team, then says there is some bad news. Vyxsin cries plaintively, "What did we do wrong?" It's adorable and funny. Phil merely tells them they are still racing.

The episode ends on a "To be continued" with the Cowboys still struggling on the flags.

Will the power of Jesus help Mallory/Gary stay in the lead? Will Amanda/Kris be thwarted by the U-turn? Will the Cowboys figure out the word puzzle? Tune in here next week, same Bat time, same Bat channel.