'Gossip Girl': 5 possible theories of WTH Katie Cassidy's Juliet is up to
Dear "Gossip Girl": You know we love you and your absurdly unrealistic, yet highly entertaining storylines. You are the guiltiest of our guiltiest pleasures and for that, we love you. That's why we have to tell you this, it's what a true friend would do: You are not "Lost." We need answers and we need them, like three episodes ago.
We totally get that Juliet (Katie Cassidy) is supposed to be this season's "big bad," but we're already six episodes into this season and we haven't gotten any answers as to why she is seemingly hell-bent on destroying the lives of our favorite Upper East Siders (and also why she is always wearing grey businesswear...on a college campus).
We've decided to get our Veronica Mars on and do a little investigating of our own to try and figure out what Manhattan's elite did to royally piss off Juliet, her locked-up brother Ben (We thought he was her boyfriend. So not shocking, but still ew!), and Serena's love interest turned professor turned accomplice Colin (Sam Page).
Theory No. 1: Remember the time Serena (Blake Lively) totally thought she killed a guy (Pete Fairman to be exact) way back in Season One, even though she really didn't? Maybe the said dead dude has a family member who believes S really is to blame and has decided to exact revenge.
Why it doesn't work: It seems like Juliet & Co. are targeting more than just Serena; They seem to be trying to take on most of the gang.
Theory No. 2: One of the many screwed-up fathers on the show screwed over the wrong person (Say screw one more time. Screw!). Seriously, take your pick. There's Chuck's late father Bart Bass (Robert John Burke), ruthless businessman devoid of human emotions; Howard Archibald (Sam Roberts) , Nate's dad who is currently in prison for embezzlement and fraud; and lastly Serena's dad William van der Woodsen (Billy Baldwin), a true gem who made his ex-wife believe she had cancer. Who knows who else he has lied to in order to get what he wants.
It seems likely one of these three could have easily wronged Ben and Juliet's family, perhaps stealing their money and destroying their family. Colin could fit in as a businessman seeking revenge on a former partner or co-worker. Why else would he be funding Juliet's operation?
Why it doesn't work: While this theory seems the most plausible to us, it's kind of boring. And when is this show ever plausible? Juliet's brother is constantly sending her text messages... from jail.
Theory No. 3: Ben and/or Juliet are actually the children of Serena's father and looking to hurt him after he abandoned their mother (seems to be his M.O.). What better way to do that than by messing with his daughter whom he recently reconciled with? We would say Bart could have a kid or two floating around, but Chuck doesn't seem to have a bull's eye on his back...yet.
Why it doesn't work: Why would Nate be involved if this were the case? Sure, he could be used as a tool to hurt Serena, but so could Dan and he's not being used. Someone get that boy a storyline, STAT!
Theory No. 4: Juliet is a Gossip Girl superfan who is dying to be a part of their world. Think Season One Jenny on (more) crack. This scenario seemed more likely in the first couple of episodes when she had a bulletin board filled with pictures and information on each of GG's favorite subjects. We've studied the screencaps of her stalkboard (Yes, we're that pathetic), but really didn't get much from it that we didn't already know.
Why it doesn't work: As we learn more about her, this theory seems less likely. Why would her jailbird brother be involved? Also, her feelings for Nate seem to transcend "Fatal Attraction" status. Her brother had his father beat up in jail and she felt sort of bad about it. True love!
Theory No. 5: Ben was a classmate of Nate's at St. Jude's School for Boys. He had a massive crush on Nate and is now bitter that he and Dan have grown so close. He's using Juliet to create a small wedge between the guys until he gets out of jail.
Why it doesn't work: It doesn't work at all. We're just convinced Dan and Nate are in love. Seriously, "Date" needs to date.
What do you guys think Juliet is up to? Are you liking her storyline? How is Ben sending her text messages from jail? I need answers! Sound off in the comments section below.
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I love Katie Cassidy and I hope she stays on GG for much longer because she's fun to watch but I'm afraid the more they drag this storyline out, the more disappointing the truth will be.
PS. Congrats on your first post!
I actually had a brief theory that Serena's professor boyfriend is paying Juliet for something entirely different. I just can't see what connection he would have to her and her convict brother. Plus I'm not sure I believe he's onboard with this whole "get Serena caught kissing me" plot. Would a semi-respected businessman really take a job at a university just to take down a few teenagers?
I'd be with you on the whole "revenge b/c of family business troubles" idea, except I don't understand why a specific family wouldn't be targeted, ie. If Juliet's family had an issue with the van der Woodsen's, why wouldn't she try to take down Eric and Lily too.
Finally, I have to ask exactly what the big payoff for Colin, Ben and Juliet is. Serena gets kicked out of Columbia? Oooooh, hit her where it hurts. It will hardly destroy her. Upset her sure, but it's not going to ruin her. Lily was right - she's a pretty girl who's going to land whichever man she chooses. And does anyone actually believe S would use an education and evetually work for a living? She'd be just as successful attending social events since that's likely all her future holds anyway. I don't really get where the writers are going with that.
I love Katie Cassidy as well and had added so much to the show. In my opinion the show hasn't been this addictive since the first season.
Although I still watch Gossip Girl, the story lines are so stupid and mindless!
Hate hate hate this storyline.
Juliet IS targeting ONLY Serena. Anyone else who gets caught in the attempt is collateral damage, just like Ben said about Nate.
Ben actually also appeared in the second episode of season one, the wild brunch. haven't rewatched it yet though.
I think they're out for Serena, and blair/nate/etc are just collateral, or being used to hurt serena more. I think he might have been at st Judes, but not the bit about crushing on nate.
I hated the Juliette character at first on GG but now i'm so rooting for her. Take Serena and her upper west side fascists down. Man these people are really starting to irritate. Vanessa/Juliette/Jenny time for a new regime. LOL
And the whole Nate/Serena/Dan love triangle please can we get some other people on this show serious this is so played out. I hope serena ends up alone that girl need some self rehabilitation and needs to get over herself
Predictable, I searched the web for anyone else with my possible ANSWER and found no one. Take a step back guys and listen, Serena went to boarding school, right? Juliet's brother was a teacher and loved it, right? Oh hey and last episode she mentioned that Serena got involved with a professor when she was away at boarding school with the twist that she happened to be underage. Last episode gave it away, Serena got Juliet's brother thrown in jail, hence ruining his life. Taaaa-da. Glad to be of assistance.
I agree with u Katherine that's been my theory from the start :)