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'Age of Love': Good gravy!
Last week on Age of Love, Mary cried. For pretty much the entire episode. Like a big, collagen-stuffed baby. Tonight, it's down to six women, and apparently we've got a lot more making out to look forward to. We join Mark in the bachelor suite, where we are greeted by a quote projected on the coffee table: "You're only as old as you let your heart make you." - Anonymous. Which gets exactly one hit if you google it, by the way. Not that I'd accuse NBC of practically making up cheesy, "Age is but a number"-type quotes, or anything.
Host Mark lets Mark know that Mark will be taking the women to do his favorite things over the next few days. First up: He picks Megan, Maria, and Mary to go surfing with him, because there's nothing he loves more than an alliterative foursome. They meet Mark outside, where he shows them his awesome woody. The car, guys, the car. Geez. Although Mark and the girls also have some fun with the word "woody." Because, really, how couldn't you?
The surfing doesn't go so well, although Maria manages to stay up on the board for about a second. Which is actually kind of an achievement. Megan gets popped in the head by her surfboard a few times, and although you can't hear it over the waves, I picture it sounding like knocking two hollow cartoon coconuts together. Meanwhile, back at the Apartment of Desperate Loneliness, stalker Amanda tries to distract herself from the thought of the object of her obsession being out on a date with three other women. Women whose names wouldn't force Mark to get all his towels re-monogrammed, in the event of their marriage. Jen and Jayanna, in the meantime, make fun of Amanda's mentally unbalanced ways.
After surfing, Mark and the M Squad have a picnic on the beach, and the girls all laugh uncomfortably loudly at his dumb joke about sand in his swimsuit. Mark invites Megan to go on a walk and they really hit it off, while Mary whines and Maria consoles her. But then- awkwardness! Betrayal! Potential crybabyness! Mary decides to join them on their romantic walk, all "Hey, guys! Just happened to be walkin' down this stretch of beach!" Weird. Maria sticks with her strategy of playing hard-to-get (the opposite of the Amanda Approach) while Mary uncomfortably plays third wheel, like she couldn'tve seen that coming.
Back at the apartment, everyone's jealous of Megan--especially Amanda. But Mark quickly texts over that he wants to see her and Jayanna next. Amanda isn't happy to be sharing her time. Jayanna isn't worried, though. Um, word to the wise, Jayanna: You may not be worried about the competition from Amanda, but you should probably be careful lest she stab you in the back. Literally. Chick is cuh-razy. And ready and willing to cut anyone who comes between her and Mark.
Their date is a movie night, and Mark asks Jayanna to share a drink with him outside first. Amanda sits in the shadows, plotting. Jayanna and Mark talk about relationships, and I have to point out--she looks HOT. Seriously. Not hot for 39, but just hot. And not creepy hot, like some of the other women. Do you guys think she's had work done? She looks almost too good not to have, but if so, it's really quality. Like, "I want the name of her doctor just in case I don't age well" quality.
Aaanyway, after their drink, Mark and Jayanna rejoin Amanda, and the three of them snuggle up to watch the movie. I say "snuggle up," because instead of the normal chairs or a couch, NBC has chosen to make the three of them watch the movie lying on down, with Mark in the middle. I don't want to know what's going on under those blankets, yo. According to Jayanna, Mark was paying the most attention to her because he was turned in her direction. According to Amanda, he likes her the best because they were holding hands the whole time. Mark walks Jayanna down to the car, they kiss a couple times, and he heads back up for some solo time with Amanda. He and the Stalker lie down under the blankets and discuss whether or not they talk in their sleep. Amanda, upon learning that he sleeps with his dog, plots Kia's untimely demise. She and Mark make out as the camera zooms in to an uncomfortable degree, and she interviews, yet again, that she loooves him. Mark says something about how seeing Amanda's boobs makes him smile.
The next day, Jen's feeling a bit left out. Not to worry, Jen! You're going to get the best date of all! Hint: It involves black leather. Mary spends some time crying while Jen gets ready to ride Mark's crotch rocket, because she wants a coo-oo-oo-ool rider. She and Mark speed off into the hills, and park at a scenic overlook. As they look into the murky stew of pollution that is Los Angeles (seriously--never look at that city from above), Mark and Jen share a romantic moment, and Mark hopes she'll be an easy rider. (Okay, okay, that was the last motorcycle joke...promise!) Back at the apartment, the twenties moan about missing out on the date. Megan, like a little kid hoping Christmas will come faster, suggests that they all go to sleep so that the date will be over sooner. In a scene that would reduce Mary to weeping and Amanda to murder, Mark and Jen play some serious tonsil hockey. It actually squicks me out a little, although that may not be the age thing so much as the sucking sound effects and Mark's "very soft lips" comment. Urgh.
Mary, however, is doing a perfectly good job of weeping on her own, this time about how she and Mark aren't connecting. Megan's response in an interview: "Good gravy!" Well, I think I know my favorite 20something (as if that wasn't already decided by process of elimination). "Good gravy" is now my new favorite expression. Awesome. Mary whines some about how she doesn't want to stick it out if she's not happy. Jen, in the process of "showing Mark what a 48-year-old is all about," makes out with him while beating him at flirty pool. He feels really comfortable with her, until she asks him where else those lips have been. If you have to ask, Jen, you probably don't want to know the answer. She returns to the house and somewhat meanly and obviously gloats about her fabulous date to the kittens (whatever, they deserve it). Amanda can barely contain her rage. Mary can barely contain her sobbing. Megan is bummed to a far more reasonable degree.
And it's elimination time already! Maria once again claims she'll quit, but the women are onto her empty promises. Mary also intimates that she doesn't know if her overused tear ducts can handle any more of this emotional turmoil. We're back up on the rooftop, and Amanda's dress can barely contain her silicon-filled funbags. (Crazybags? Stalkerbags? Could-be-used-to-suffocate-the-competitionbags?) Mark tells Jen that he had a great time with her, and asks her to stay. He says the same to Megan, as well as Jayanna (yay!). Amanda, who actually looks older than Jayanna with all the makeup she has caked on, watches on tensely. She's up next, and right as Mark is trying to ask her to stay, tearfully tells him about her frighteningly strong feelings for him. I'd tell you to run away fast, Mark, but I know you have a bum knee. Hobble away, dude, hobble away! He asks her to stay, leaving Maria and Mary, the almost-quitters, as the last two women standing.
Maria gives Mary a nice pep talk about carrying on in her absence before stepping up and, once again, failing to quit. Ha! He asks her to stay, and the women smile through their disappointment. Mary, of course, is out. Shockingly enough, she manages to get through her talk with him without crying, and actually gives a great little speech. There is, naturally, much sobbing both when she gets the group hug and in her final interview. Fair enough, Age of Love, although I'd hoped for something a bit more interesting involving Amanda being booted, going crazy, and shoving the remaining women off the roof. Ah, well. There's always next week!
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love it! i must say, i dont have a favorite right now. i always liked the older women, but im shocked at how mean they are to the younger girls.
my take on the women that are left
Jen: gorgeous, young at heart, but a little immature with her gloating
Jayanna: beautiful, confident, young at heart, carefree. I like her -- but she needs to tone down her self worship (a little over confident). So Amandas crazy -- big deal. Be a little mature
Amanda - pretty, fake pretty (silicone, collage, pounds of makeup). Crazy obsessive -- made me kinda sick to see her stare at him in the bedroom. Im suprised she hasnt lashed out on the other women
Maria -- I really like her -- shes pretty, sweet. But doesnt know how to stand by her word. If you say you are going to leave, LEAVE
Meghan -- not much known about her, shes very pretty, and Im impressed with her maturity. Shes the youngest but seems to be the most mature of all.
priscilla | Jul 16, 2007 9:14:00 PM | #
meghan is the only gal on the show
that isn't botoxed, collagened, injected to death.
I can't believe the phoniness of the gals.
It is like watching a train wreck.
Amanda is so plastic and strange looking.
The show is hilarious and sad at the same time
Yikes.
her boobs are going to be used as flotation devices
Oh man, this show is too funny. I'm going to miss weeping-Mary, but thankfully stalker-Amanda is still around. Speaking of which, why does she insist on wearing 7 pounds of makeup? Note to all women: less is more!
As for who’s had work done of the remaining five, Amanda’s the only obvious candidate. Jen may have, but it seems like she just takes good care of herself. Jayanna, Maria, and Meghan all seem natural. But who really knows? The previous eliminations (Mary, Tess, Kelli) definitely had work done.
This show is the best comedy of the summer. It is a trainwreck...but I have to admit, I can't look away. By the way, the reviewer of the show, Liz, writes amazing recaps. Keep it up.
eickhry | Jul 17, 2007 9:59:22 AM | #Oh, Bob, I like Jen, but her nose is practically a replica of Michael Jackson's or Joan Rivers' - Jen has had work! She looks good, but there is definitely work there. And I'm glad she gloated - especially since she had the most tongue time AND those annoying little 20-somethings (especially Mary) have been referring to the 40-somethings shriveled ovaries and sagging boobs since the beginning of the show!
I am glad Maria didn't leave - now we don't have to hear Mary cry or snip about shriveled ovaries. And, Mary needs a Pilates class PRONTO!
And I don't think Jayanna is mean - what part of "I'm worried about Amanda - she seems a little too intense about her feelings for Mark" is mean - Amanda is NUTS!
Michelle | Jul 17, 2007 10:10:26 AM | #Awesome blog recap of this show. :p I enjoyed reading it even though I saw the show last night. It made me laugh!
Yes, Jen most likely had some work done. I wouldn't think that Mary, Maria or Megan has had anything done. The other girls, most likely *something* whether small or big. Jen looks gorgeous, and with perky boobage like that, it's hard for them to look like that at 48 unless something's been done to them. Either way, I'm sure she does take care of herself, as well, by eating right and exercising.
Jen's my favorite out of all of them, and I'm glad she gloated a bit about their date too. The 20-somethings bashed the 40-somethings before even meeting them, and in fact were quite mean in what they said. The older women are plain competitive - fun and competitive -, but the 20-somethings got dirty from the get-go with personal insults (shrivelled ovaries, wrinkles, etc.).
Kelsy | Jul 17, 2007 12:16:11 PM | #I'm so glad Mary is gone. She was pathetic and has problems. I love Jen. She is absolutely gorgeous for being any age. Coming from a 23 year old male, I am the most attracted to Jen. Megan is cute too. I have a feeling stalker Amanda is going to get the boot soon.
Eric | Jul 18, 2007 12:43:27 AM | #Mark strikes me as kind of a creep. He's really playing all these women as hard as he can. I get that he's in a difficult position, but he's really skanking it up more than necessary.
Stacy | Jul 18, 2007 1:39:05 PM | #I am going to miss Mary, she was so great to laugh at! She must be dying now watching this show as to how she is portrayed as such a crybaby.
I thought it was great when Jen came in from her solo date and was gloating to the kittens. It's so funny on these reality dating shows when they are talking about their dates-they are all competing for the SAME guy, yet they pretend to be encouraging and want all the details of the date-but it makes for a good guilty pleasure.
Kathie | Jul 19, 2007 8:31:20 AM | #I liked Amanda until she made Kelli look bad...which is the only reason Mark got rid of Kelli. Amanda is a treacherous sneak and she is also obsessive, but, unfortunately, she seems to be the one Mark is most attracted to, other than Jen. I think he likes Jayanna a lot, but there doesn't seem to be any passion in him for her. Maria is trying to make what worked for that extremely unattractive Tessa on the last Bachelor show work for her by playing hard to get, but I don't think it will work for her. I agree with another poster, Amanda does look older than Jayanna, and she is almost at the point of looking older than Jen. Amanda is beautiful, but it is a fake beauty. Unfortunately, Mark is probably going to pick her and be miserable, because she is going to be jealous, possessive, and vindictive.
Lin | Jul 21, 2007 12:29:54 AM | #Megan is my favorite. She's cute and carefree, and surprisingly mature for her age. Though her comments about the 40 year olds gets annoying something (the whole she could be my mom thing).
Everyone needs to stay away from Amanda. She's manipulative, backstabbing, and obsessive. She acts as though she and Mark are married. I liked her at first, but then she began all this jealous talk and stuff about her falling for Mark, and it's scary.
I used to like Jayanna, but she's getting too preachy. She lectures the other girls often. She also comes off as two faced because she seems like a very different person with Mark. She's still confident with him, but she doesn't come off as preachy or motherly or etc.
I've liked Jen from the beginning. She looks great for her age and she's in pretty good shape too. Plus, she still has a young heart.
Maria is alright, she doesn't stand out too much for me though. She seems mature and intense at the same time. She knows what she wants. She's also a good friend to the crying mass that is Mary, which I believe must be difficult. At the same time, she gets swayed very easily. She's upfront about the things she knows she wants, but she can easily change her mind. Which is proven by the times she says she doesn't feel a connection with Mark.
Miss Mary is a comic relief in the show because of her overactive tear ducts. She cries in 90% of her appearances during the show. She seems like an okay person, but she's way too emotional and needs to calm down. She comes off as immature in that respect.
I'm generally indifferent about Mark. He's cute, not gorgeous. He's nice and has a good heart, but is kind of timid. Personally, I find him a tad bit boring. But then again, maybe he's just trying to be level-headed around so many women.
Anyway, I just hope Amanda doesn't win because I cannot imagine dating her. I kinda hope Megan wins, but I haven't decided if she and Mark would be compatible.
Katie | Jul 24, 2007 8:05:03 PM | #
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