Jacuzzi threesome can't save 'Survivor' damsel

December 14, 06:14 PM

Well, everybody got what they wanted on last week's episode of Survivor: Cook Island. Jonathan, the season's most effectively competitive (and unquestionably obnoxious) player, was voted out. Will everybody be happier in his absence on Thursday's (Dec. 14) episode? Or will they, like me, miss the King Rat?

Pre-credit sequence. Jonathan's hat has been hung in effigy and Adam and Parvati are still gloating over eliminating the "nuisance." While they acknowledge that they're in a weak spot, they know they have to find a way to break up the plucky Aitu Four. It's hard not to be amused by the fact that despite squandering several positions of power due to strategic idiocy (and physical apathy), Parvati and Adam have decided to think of themselves as underdogs. I guess they may be underdogs in terms of numbers, but they sure aren't loveable underdogs.

Here's mud in everybody's eye. Tree-mail warns them that the reward challenge will be muddy, but that the prize is rejuvenation. The goal is to use your body to accumulate mud and fill buckets. The top three finishers will get a luxury evening with food and a bed. In theory the person with the most surface area ought to have the advantage, or at least the person best able to maximize their surface area. Jeff Probst keeps announcing everybody's strategies, mostly producing suggestive dialogue like "Parvati, loading up her chest" and "Ozzy's got a nice load on his hair." Somehow Ozzy accumulates 45 pounds of mud, nearly twice his nearest competitor. Parvati and Yul finish second and third, while Ozzie sends Adam off to Exile Island.

Muddied and conspiratorial. Sundra and Becky are alone at camp, bonding over their misery and Ozzie's challenge mastery. They may not be smart enough to swim off their mud, but Becky is quick enough to realize that Ozzie may be unbeatable, which kind of makes him a teeny tiny bit of a threat. She decides Ozzie may be in need of eradication.

Muddied and on a plane. Parvati, Ozzie and Yul are sitting, covered in inches of guck, on a nice plane swathed in plastic wrap. They arrive at a remote resort and promptly get leied and shower ("I will remember that shower, that one particular shower, for the rest of my life," Ozzie observes). The showers are followed by massages for everybody. A chef prepares an elaborate meal full of flavors ("And nothing tastes like coconut," Parvati enthuses), followed by a well-timed power outage serves as a perfect intro for a native dance ("It was like way better than dinner and a movie," Parvati adds). Then they all get naked in the hot tub, which means flirtation between Ozzie and Parvati, who notes that the numbers are in her favor. I'm undecided if that's nasty-hot or just plain nasty.

Muddied and truly alone. Adam seems to have swum and little more. He lies on Exile Island letting the flies cover him. "Who needs a fire when you can eat everything raw?" he mutters, chowing down on some slimy crustacean or other as the rain begins to fall.

Stealth mastermind Becky. As soon as the reward threesome returns, Becky pulls Yul aside to warn him that Ozzie needs to get got. Yul knows he can't beat Ozzie in Final Two and agrees that a change is in order. Yul also figures that Parvati may be a threat, because she could have the power to lure Ozzie.

Immunity challenge. They have to cross a series of balance beams carrying puzzle pieces that can be used to create a ball-maze. You'll never guess who gets out to a massive lead... Yup. That'd be Ozzie. That's the problem with plotting against a guy who can't lose. Yul catches up a bit, but it's an illusion. It's another challenge win for Ozzie.

Time to play "Let's Lure Ozzie!" Since Ozzie is immune, Yul wants to separate Greek Row. Adam tells him he wants to stay and Yul says he can make it happen. Parvati tells the puppet master that she would like to stay, but Yul offers no promises. In the tent, Adam and Parvati approach Ozzie to ask if there's any way for him to teeter. He entertains the idea, a prospect that makes Yul's head hurt. He storms into the tent and warns Adam against plotting. Yul doesn't break Adam's knee-caps, but you can see how he might like the idea.

Tribal council. Yul begins his effort to curry favor with the jury by bringing Jonathan's hat to him. This act of generosity is discussed for much longer than it should be. Odd. Is the Rat King really going to make his choice based on a floppy hat? The Aitu alliance opts to go against Parvati.

The finale is Sunday. Who are you rooting for? And, more importantly, who do you think will win?

in Reality TV

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Comments (27)

Comments

I'm rooting for Ozzie. He deserves to win. He has done everything and more for that prize. Yul would be my next bet, but whatever happens I can't wait for Sunday.

I think Jonathan is way too smart to choose Yul (if he's in the final 2) because he brought him his hat. I just hope Ozzie is there with him.

andream | Dec 14, 2006 10:24:28 PM | #

I too am rooting for Ozzie. He is on a Colbyesque streak. Never has a player deserved to win more since Rob from Amazon.

I could accept Yul or Becky, but definitely not Sundra or Adam.

Dusty | Dec 15, 2006 7:18:59 AM | #

Maybe I'm being a bit naive, but I saw Yul returning the hat as simply the right thing to do- someone had left behind a cherished item and Yul returned it. I didn't see it as currying favor until Jeff brought it up. Repeatedly.
I agree Ozzie should be in the final two, against Yul or Becky, but there is something to be said for how Sundra is playing the game...waaay below the radar.
I felt a little embarrassed for Parvati at her feeble attempt to sway anyone in the hot tub. Nasty hot or just Nasty? I prefer embarrassing.
Notice how I haven't mentioned Adam? I don't think he will make it to the final round, and I think this is a pivotal move for Yul. I think Adam would vote for Yul instead of...and so would Candice if Adam does. That's two votes not for Ozzie and that could make all of the difference.
Besides...Yul's got some hot abs, wouldn't you agree?

Mavourneen | Dec 15, 2006 8:29:41 AM | #

Yul or Ozzy to win, but it would be much fair for Yul to win b'se he really has played the game wisely.

Ann | Dec 15, 2006 9:41:31 AM | #

Just vote off Adam next and from there it does not matter who win.

Jim | Dec 15, 2006 9:42:54 AM | #

Justice has been served for Jonathan to votting off Pavatti. Now please vote off Adam next.

Eddie | Dec 15, 2006 9:47:39 AM | #

I agree Yul probably returned Jonathan his hat because he asked for it-- everybody's reading too much into it.

It was hilarious when Yul chastised Adam for talking to Ozzy and Adam slinked away.

izz | Dec 15, 2006 11:13:16 AM | #

I want Yul to win, but sometimes I think he talks toooo much about his strategy. He should just shutup.

jas | Dec 15, 2006 12:23:00 PM | #

Ozzy to "WIN"!!!

Tom | Dec 15, 2006 12:23:34 PM | #

Sundra shouldn't be discredited. She knew she wasn't physically strong so she needed to attach herself to strong players. Remember that she stayed strong to Yul (even when Nate was on her original tribe).

Don't forget that we have two big whatifs still in play:

1) The car - whoever wins the car never wins the money; if ozzie continues his streak, can he win the big prize?

2) The last challenge is usually won by the most unexpected (think Dani from last season). This could put Becky or Sundra in charge of picking the final 2 contestants standing with them.

Anthony | Dec 15, 2006 12:35:50 PM | #

Way too much read into the hat incident. He was a nice guy acting nice. Sheesh. Jeff is trying to punch a hole in Yul's invincibility shield. Switch Yul and Jonathan's ethnicities and they are treated very differently by others.
One can also say Sundra has played a clever below the radar game. However had her tribe of 4 lost any challenge before the merge she would have booted out. I suspect if nobody flip floped teams she would still have been booted out in her tribe of 6. There is some luck in survivor.
Eventually Ozzy will probably run into a challenge that is mostly mental. If he loses any remaining one at this point he is unanimously voted out I believe.
The most interesting left for me is whether Becky will ever have a chance to become disloyal to Yul, for instance by maybe choosing Sundra to join her in the finals.

Dave | Dec 15, 2006 1:37:00 PM | #

I think ozzie should win he has worked hard for it.

Pat | Dec 15, 2006 1:53:45 PM | #

i hope the reunion has a highlight package of all the 'digitized' images of ozzy's never quite in place pants.

megan | Dec 15, 2006 3:50:58 PM | #

Ozzy to win!!
why do people think ozzy will lose if the challenge have more mental elements. Ozzy is not dumb and Yul and Becky are not as smart as everyone would think . just the fact that they are lawyer and scholarship holder? In fact, Adam is very smart also. Anyway, Ozzy should win because he is a real survivor.I wouldn't mind Yul to win because he is a nice person and trying to play the game as nice as possible. Ozzy will at least get 4 votes i guess (Adam, Parvati, Candice and Nate).

Marie | Dec 15, 2006 6:46:01 PM | #

Ozzie should definetly win. Becky and Sundra are there for a very easy ride, doing nothing and just getting through. I really disliked Becky saying Ozzie has to go because he is too good. She is a total b..., hope she gets boted out next. Ozzie should win.

Lizz | Dec 15, 2006 7:08:15 PM | #

Ozzie or Yul for the final two, just because ozzie worked hard for this and because Yul is not being a cutthroat in this game unlike some people. *cough Jonathan cough*

Dean | Dec 15, 2006 9:21:47 PM | #

I prefer Yul or Becky to win; while Ozzy is a very strong physical player, he hasn't 'played' the game, except for when he got his team to vote out Billy. That move, and his nasty little smile when he made Billy fall in the water during the challenge they threw, turned me totally off Ozzy forever. Yes, the way he swims and moves is beautiful, but that doesn't mean he's the best person to win - he's arrogant and would've turned on the others in a heartbeat. I definitely want to see Yul win, but won't mind if Becky or Sundra do.

Karen | Dec 16, 2006 6:30:23 AM | #

I'm usually willing to accept the under-the-radar players, but honestly, I think Sundra just got lucky to be with who she is. She has never been shown to strategize, and the only good thing she can be credited for is sticking with the Aitu tribe before they got the upper-hand.

Yul's hat gesture was nothing more than a nice thing to do, I completely agree with those who have said that. Jeff just needed to find some drama to talk about....over and over again.

My brain says Ozzy will win.
My heart says Yul will win.
My gut says Becky will win.

Justin | Dec 16, 2006 9:27:30 AM | #

I would like to see Ozzy win this whole thing. The car and the million! Yul, to me, has been an OK player, but part of his success is him posessing the hidden immunity idle, or else he would've been voted off weeks ago. Sundra is a great person, but hasn't shown any strategice moves. Becky....I am kind of dissapointed in her strategy. She is very low under the radar, and has to make some drastic moves sooner or later and by that I mean vote off Yul, or else she can only become runner-up if she is lucky.

Adam has no shot. But I like him. The Candice-Adam kiss at tribal has been the highlight of this season. Good luck Ozzy!

Bram | Dec 17, 2006 3:13:36 AM | #

Ozzy doesn't deserve to win. I think it's great he won all the challenges but he did nothing strategic in the game. Survivor is not just a physical game, it's social and strategic. If all it takes to win is win the challenges then why do you need a jury. Yul is the better and more deserved player to win. Yes, he made mistakes but at least he is playing a strategic unlike Ozzy who let Yul takes all the heat in the vote off.

Jessie | Dec 17, 2006 7:52:11 AM | #

I hope Ozzy wins! He deserves it. The others get on my nerves especially Yul.

Mallory | Dec 17, 2006 9:31:07 AM | #

Ozzie has had great physical prowess in the game. I agree that he is not dumb. Look at the last immunity challenge: he put the puzzle table together correctly on the first try. Yul lost because he made mistakes.

However, I'm rooting for Yul as the overall winner. I like his honest approach to the game. It is true that part of his success has been possessing the immunity idol, but he had choices about when to reveal that fact. He didn't have to reveal it to everybody. Yul has been very open with his strategy. At least he has one. Ozzy does too but his is more physically based.

I think it's very intersting that even going into the last episode there is at least one person from each of the 4 original tribes. It should be an interesting show tonight.

Christy | Dec 17, 2006 11:53:23 AM | #

Ozzie should win! he's smart and strong. If Ozzie does not win Yul should win.

joker | Dec 17, 2006 6:06:00 PM | #

Well, Yul won and I'm happy about it.

Joshua | Dec 18, 2006 9:37:01 AM | #

Ozzie didn't need to manipulate or lie to get into the final 3 and Yul was a weasel the whole time. If not for the luck of finding the immunity idol and Ozzie winning challenges for the team to keep them alive Yul would have been just a minor character and butt-kissing loser. Ozzie vs Yul one-on-one? Gee, I wonder who would win. Why is it that the most manipulative players (who seek to take more credit than they deserve for the success of their team....while plotting to destroy them) are the most respected. Based on merit Ozzie was king. Without him his team would have went nowhere and one-on-one he kicked all their butts.

John | Dec 18, 2006 1:41:00 PM | #