'Big Brother' house preview: The Heathers

Today's "Big Brother 11" preview features the Heathers (that's the popular clique, for those of you keeping score at home).

The popular clique in the Big Brother house is made up of, basically, the prettiest people with scarcely enough brains to tie their own shoes. Two of them are models and the other just had her boobs done. I already know who I'm rooting against!

Braden Bacha is a 28 year-old surfer, model and actor. I'm sure he's better looking in person but in that picture above, I really want to punch him in his cheeks-sucking-in-Zoolander-pose face. He lists his favorite activities as "sleeping and talking to girls" [shakes head] and likes to boast about his intelligence, looks, charm and desireability. He also designs his own jewelry. Braden is single. I am stunned.

Jordan Lloyd is a 22 year-old waitress from North Carolina who just had a boob job. She won't have sex on television because her grandpa will be watching. I have to ask... is that the ONLY reason you won't have sex on television? Her strategy will be to become BFF with the girls and flirt with the guys for votes. I'd like to ask her, "Recent polls have shown a fifth of Americans can't locate the U.S. on a world map. Why do you think this is?"

Laura Crosby is a 21 year-old bikini model who hopes to use her looks to carry her in the game. I'm shocked, shocked to find that gambling is going on in here. While in the house, she plans to "live in her bikini," which will show off her self-titled "Tramp Stamp" to great effect. She also says her body is her secret weapon. Something tells me if she lives in her bikini, it isn't so much of a "secret" weapon. VIdeo of Laura is below.